Humor me for a moment as I declare that last Wednesday night, during worship time at ReWired (our Wednesday night worship gathering for youth at Crossroads Church of Walton County), it hit me that I am in a position to compare myself to the Father in the parable of the Prodigal Son. I know, I know. That role is usually reserved for God, but let's start at the beginning of this rabbit trail that happened in my heart and mind.
For those of you who don't know, this past Sunday was "Orphan Sunday". It's a day to raise Christians' awareness about the 147,000,000 orphans in the world and give 'em all a kick in the pants to DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Well, we have some stinkin' amazing students at our church who I think seriously out-give and out-serve most Christian adults, so my dear hubby decided that we would do "Orphan Wednesday". How cool is that? I mean, I have been in youth groups where no one would show up for that night. What? No advice on dating or how to make more friends? Like I said, our students are amazing. So naturally my mind was thinking through this beautiful process that we are in...bringing a little girl who currently has no momma or daddy into our family forever. I just got a little dreamy imagining the moment when someone would hand her over to me and I would bawl and smile. Then I thought about bringing her home and my other kids waiting at the airport to see their new sister for the first time. And that's when it hit me. Will my sweet little biological kids ever have a moment when they're sick of all the fuss about their adopted sister? Will they wonder why they always have to hear Mommy and Daddy talk about and pray for money to get their sister home? Will they be jealous of the time we spend filling out paperwork and fundraising and packing to leave? Will the time ever come when they ask, "Why is everything all about getting this girl here?!"
As of now, my girlies are just as excited about getting their sister home as we are. Every time they find a dollar in their pockets, it goes towards the adoption. Every night when we pray and at every blessing, they pray for the money to get her home and that God would take care of her until she's here. They've painted pictures to hang in her room. When they play house, one of their dolls is always their little sister that we adopted. They are just as smitten as we are. But I just started to stress about them getting sick of it all and wondered if it was wrong of me to act any differently about this little one's arrival. I mean, obviously a lot went into getting Alana, Nevaeh, and Pax into the world as well. They cost quite a bit of money, and we decorated rooms for them and bought them clothes and blankies. And I fell asleep quite often dreaming of the moment they would enter the world and I would hold them for the first time. But let's just say that I wasn't Googling about where they were every day. Or searching for any blog or website that pertained to where they came from. Or wearing tshirts and necklaces to raise awareness about them. Nor did I have an app on my iPhone that told me every day what the weather was like where they were. It's just different, and I started to think that maybe I need to tone it down around my children so that they aren't like, "Wow. Mom sure does love our brown baby. Guess we're too boring and white for her.".
Now in my rational mind, I really don't think that would ever happen. Just because I know their hearts are so into this. But, you know how a mother's mind can be. And God was so gracious to me in that moment. As I sang (or at least as close as I can get to singing!), the Holy Spirit brought to my mind the story of the prodigal son. Usually when I read that parable I wonder, "Am I being like the older brother lately? Do I resent the grace that God is bestowing on someone else?". That's usually my application. But last Wednesday night, I immediately told God, "I see. I know how that father felt.". I now know what it's like to feel like there is a sense of urgency to get one child home. And I understand that what might be perceived as favoritism is actually just the knowledge that my bios are safe and with me. All of me and all that I have is available to Alana and Nevaeh and Pax at any time. But this sweet little African princess of mine is far away from me and my protection right now, and that calls for action. The parable of the lost coin, or the 99 sheep that the shepherd was willing to leave for a while to get that one sheep home. Oh, MAN, do I get it. I have already begun to feel guilt about leaving my American babies for a week when we go and pick our little one up. It will be the longest I've gone without seeing them EVER. But I've just been saying over and over to God, "Thank You, thank You, thank You. Thank You soooo much for relieving me of that guilt and reminding me that it doesn't imply in the least that I love my bios less when I am going crazy pursuing this lost, lonely girl." (I mean, I KNOW I don't love them less...there's just the worry that it will be perceived that way.) Nope. The shepherd didn't love the one lost sheep more than the 99. It's just that the 99 were already safe and sound with their protector, and his love for that one was great enough to cause him to single-mindedly pursue it.
The parable of the lost coin is probably the one that I can picture myself in the most. Probably because: 1) the main character is a woman, and 2) I lose things a lot and have to "sweep the house and seek diligently until I find it." But it is SUCH a beautiful picture to me now that I'm on this journey. She had 10 coins, and 1 turns up missing. All of the coins were of equal value, but only one was missing. So only one got searched for in a panicked frenzy and only one caused her to "call together her friends and neighbors, saying, 'Rejoice with me, for I have found the coin that I had lost.'"
All of this has left me with two things. First of all, an immense amount of gratitude to my Father for His crazy love for me. I mean, the first adoption journey that I was a part of was when He adopted me. And all of the love and urgency and pursuit and intensity and thinking of nothing else that I have shown for my girl...it pales in comparison to the love and urgency and pursuit and intensity and focus of our Heavenly Father. Every day as I run to the mailbox hoping and praying that our I600 approval is in it, it crosses my mind that God was thinking of me waaay before I was a part of His family too. What a great God!
The second thing that I am left with is the hope that Alana, Nevaeh, and Pax are much more gracious and loving and accepting than the prodigal son's big brother was. But if they have their moments of pouting or anger, I pray that God will help me to be as merciful as the father in the story was. That I would be able to impart to them the understanding that "they are always with me, and all that is mine is theirs. But it was fitting to celebrate and be glad, for this your sister was dead, and is alive; she was lost, and is found."
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Thursday, October 28, 2010
We are Silly People
I wonder, has God whispered in your ear to do something that sounds impossible or exhausting or both? Chances are, if you're really pursuing Him and listening to Him, He has. I'm there. I hate to harp on money (I think I've been around Jono too long :) ), but it's my blog. So I will reiterate how stinkin' impossible it seems to come up with THOUSANDS of dollars to adopt and host a precious orphan. THOUSANDS. Every time I say it, I'm like breathless. And, I'm not gonna lie. Thinking about having a special needs 4 year old from another country in my home for a month sounds slightly exhausting. Not to mention the LIFETIME of opening our home and family to orphans that God has clearly called Jono and I to. As in, no retirement. No year-long vacations. No "empty nest".
In the midst of all that, God has given me a group of astonishing young ladies to lead in bible study, a small group of kindergartners to teach, and He's dropped people from other NATIONS at our doorstep to reach for Him. At times, I could easily believe the people who tell me, "That's just too much for someone with 3 young kids to do.". Actually, agreed. It is too much. But, lucky for me, God went ahead and dealt with me on this very issue today in His word.
In 1 Peter 4:10-11 it says, "As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace: whoever speaks as one who speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies--in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ."
You know what? I am to do the things that God has called me to do in HIS strength...not my own. And why? "In order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ." When I serve in my own strength, I get grumpy and tired and judgmental and I start to have a martyr's complex. But we simply cannot sustain a life of service and sacrifice in our own power. EVERY GODLY WORK REQUIRES GOD'S POWER. That makes so much sense, but for some reason when things start getting complicated our first reaction is to switch over to our power...which is no power at all. We're such silly people.
I also read Matthew 14:15-21 today where Jesus feeds the five thousand. You know, Jesus could have fed those people any way He wanted to. He could've whistled down some manna. He could've called each person over to Himself individually and handed them some food Himself. But instead He gave the provision to His followers and instructed them to dispense the food to the people. Is that not great?! What a BEAUTIFUL picture of what Jesus wants to do with His church today. Yeah, He could just create a new mom and dad for every orphan, or make birds carry food to the people who are starving, or make clean water flow out of a big rock to the people who are dying from a lack of it. But that is not His plan. We are the church. We are the "hands and feet." When we Christians in the U.S. sit back with our abundance and keep dreaming of how we can get more and more without dispensing anything to those in need, it's about as foolish as if the disciples in that story had taken all that food that Jesus provided and sat down under a tree to gorge themselves on it wondering when Jesus was gonna feed all those other people. Oh, we really are silly, aren't we?
Well, back to the whole "how are we gonna have the money and strength to make this whole adoption and hosting thing work" issue. I figured it out.
"And God is able to make all grace abound to you so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times you may abound in every good work." -2 Corinthians 9:8.
Hallelujah! Is that black or white or what? If God deems our hosting and adopting a good work (which the bible would lead me to believe He does), He will give us bookoos (sp?) of grace and make us sufficient in all things (read: money). Aaaahhh. Yep, that's me exhaling all of my worries and stress:)
Now I just hope that all of the disciples out there will pass out the fish and bread like they're supposed to.
P.S. Props to the book "Get Uncomfortable" by Todd Phillips for a couple of quotes in this post. It's a great on-your-own study or curriculum for a group.
In the midst of all that, God has given me a group of astonishing young ladies to lead in bible study, a small group of kindergartners to teach, and He's dropped people from other NATIONS at our doorstep to reach for Him. At times, I could easily believe the people who tell me, "That's just too much for someone with 3 young kids to do.". Actually, agreed. It is too much. But, lucky for me, God went ahead and dealt with me on this very issue today in His word.
In 1 Peter 4:10-11 it says, "As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God's varied grace: whoever speaks as one who speaks oracles of God; whoever serves, as one who serves by the strength that God supplies--in order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ."
You know what? I am to do the things that God has called me to do in HIS strength...not my own. And why? "In order that in everything God may be glorified through Jesus Christ." When I serve in my own strength, I get grumpy and tired and judgmental and I start to have a martyr's complex. But we simply cannot sustain a life of service and sacrifice in our own power. EVERY GODLY WORK REQUIRES GOD'S POWER. That makes so much sense, but for some reason when things start getting complicated our first reaction is to switch over to our power...which is no power at all. We're such silly people.
I also read Matthew 14:15-21 today where Jesus feeds the five thousand. You know, Jesus could have fed those people any way He wanted to. He could've whistled down some manna. He could've called each person over to Himself individually and handed them some food Himself. But instead He gave the provision to His followers and instructed them to dispense the food to the people. Is that not great?! What a BEAUTIFUL picture of what Jesus wants to do with His church today. Yeah, He could just create a new mom and dad for every orphan, or make birds carry food to the people who are starving, or make clean water flow out of a big rock to the people who are dying from a lack of it. But that is not His plan. We are the church. We are the "hands and feet." When we Christians in the U.S. sit back with our abundance and keep dreaming of how we can get more and more without dispensing anything to those in need, it's about as foolish as if the disciples in that story had taken all that food that Jesus provided and sat down under a tree to gorge themselves on it wondering when Jesus was gonna feed all those other people. Oh, we really are silly, aren't we?
Well, back to the whole "how are we gonna have the money and strength to make this whole adoption and hosting thing work" issue. I figured it out.
"And God is able to make all grace abound to you so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times you may abound in every good work." -2 Corinthians 9:8.
Hallelujah! Is that black or white or what? If God deems our hosting and adopting a good work (which the bible would lead me to believe He does), He will give us bookoos (sp?) of grace and make us sufficient in all things (read: money). Aaaahhh. Yep, that's me exhaling all of my worries and stress:)
Now I just hope that all of the disciples out there will pass out the fish and bread like they're supposed to.
P.S. Props to the book "Get Uncomfortable" by Todd Phillips for a couple of quotes in this post. It's a great on-your-own study or curriculum for a group.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Are we CRAZZZZYYY??
I'd like to think so. But only in the sense that 1 Corinthians 2:14 talks about...more on that in a sec. Let's rewind a few days. As many of you know, our family has hosted orphans over Christmas the past two years. It is an AMAZING experience...to get to show the love of Christ and the love of a family to a child or children who otherwise would never know it. Totally indescribable. But when it came around this year to sign up for hosting, we "obviously" decided to just be a support for others who were hosting and not do it ourselves. After all, we are in the midst of an international adoption which is requiring every extra penny that we have. Not to mention that, if everything goes perfectly, there is a chance that we could be traveling to Africa in January to get our baby. So it would be irresponsible to host...right?
And then it hit me. Or maybe He hit me. First of all, did I think that I needed a sign from God to bring an orphan into my home? What? The sky needed to split open or something? The Holy Spirit brought to my mind verse after verse where the Lord says, in essense, TAKE CARE OF ORPHANS!!!! No, Heather, you don't have to pray about it. Yes is ALWAYS the answer when it comes to the least of these. Sheesh, I'm ignorant sometimes. Then as that started to settle in, the obvious worries started popping in my head. Mainly money, money, money. I mean, we're begging and scraping and selling stuff (both our own stuff and products for a fundraiser) just to get through this adoption. Where are we gonna come up with another $2500? And then, that same Holy Spirit that John 14:26 says will teach me all things and even remind me of the things He's already taught me said, "5 loaves and 2 fish, Heather. Just offer whatcha got. I am God and can probably cover the rest." I'm not sure if He really said it that sarcastically, but He had every right too. So I mentioned it to Jono. He, of course, had the same money fears, but I assured him that I would contact the people at New Horizons and just offer what we have. If they didn't feel like it could work, at least we had been faithful.
Now we're into yesterday. I'm looking through the darn photo listing trying to figure out what kid to put on hold. Yes, it's excruciating. But I slowly came up with some criteria:
1)Scholarships! Since we have absolutely NO moolah in savings to help this procedure out, I narrowed it down to the kiddos with scholarships. Plus, a lot of the kids with scholarships have them because they are overlooked due to disabilities. Double whammy!
2)Young and/or special needs. This is because my girlies are such little mommies and, aside from the perfect match of Oksana and Vitya last year:(, they would feel much more like part of the family helping out if the child needed some helping out.
So I narrowed it down to two children...Bogdan, a 4 year old boy with some speech delay and Nadia who has cerebral palsy and is 6. I emailed New Horizons and shared EVERYTHING with them. Their advice was to go with Bogdan since he would be a little easier...especially since I already have little ones. I told them I'd think about it. I did not even feel right about saying, "Yeah, give me the easy kid.". But then, that little boy was such a cutie and so young. What a stinkin' struggle. I woke up early this morning begging God to make it clear which one we should host. I even said to Him, "I wish You would just pick for me. Don't make me pick.". But when 9:00 rolled around, He hadn't sent me a telegram, so I decided Jono would be more comfortable with a little boy. That was it. I couldn't think about it anymore and I put him on hold. Then, guess what? Twenty minutes later my phone rang and it was New Horizons. The message went something like this, "Hey Heather. We've had something come up. One of the special needs girls from Latvia just had her host family back out on her and all of the paperwork for Latvian kids is due today. If we don't get a new host family for her, she's gonna be pulled from the program. She's 4 years old and was born premature and suffers from a degree of fetal alcohol syndrome. Would you be interested?" Why am I always surprised when God answers prayers? Like I said, I'm quite ignorant sometimes. So God picked Liga for us. Check her out...
Presh, huh? Now, back to 1 Corinthians 2:14. It says, "The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned." God is so good to give me what I need to hear in His word at just the right time. I looked up the word "folly" in the dictionary, and it means "a foolish action, practice, idea; absurdity. Does that not describe exactly what first pops in your mind when you think of us doing this? Hmmm...example of absurdity:
1)Adopting. In the words of one kind stranger, "It's just a lot of money to end up with a broken heart. Them orphan kids always end up breaking their parents' hearts." So sweet.
2)Adopting internationally AND inter-racially. Do you have any idea how many times I've heard, "Why not somewhere with white kids?"?
3)Hosting while broke and in the process of adopting.
And I won't even boggle your mind with all of the other absurd things God has rolling around in my mind. Let's just suffice it to say that someone looking at it with their natural eyes just can't accept it. It's a "foolish action and idea". But spiritually it makes sense. To God it makes sense.
If you would like to help get Liga to America this Christmas, click here to donate.
I know every time you hear from me it's asking for money, but all I know to do is throw it out there and see what God does.
And then it hit me. Or maybe He hit me. First of all, did I think that I needed a sign from God to bring an orphan into my home? What? The sky needed to split open or something? The Holy Spirit brought to my mind verse after verse where the Lord says, in essense, TAKE CARE OF ORPHANS!!!! No, Heather, you don't have to pray about it. Yes is ALWAYS the answer when it comes to the least of these. Sheesh, I'm ignorant sometimes. Then as that started to settle in, the obvious worries started popping in my head. Mainly money, money, money. I mean, we're begging and scraping and selling stuff (both our own stuff and products for a fundraiser) just to get through this adoption. Where are we gonna come up with another $2500? And then, that same Holy Spirit that John 14:26 says will teach me all things and even remind me of the things He's already taught me said, "5 loaves and 2 fish, Heather. Just offer whatcha got. I am God and can probably cover the rest." I'm not sure if He really said it that sarcastically, but He had every right too. So I mentioned it to Jono. He, of course, had the same money fears, but I assured him that I would contact the people at New Horizons and just offer what we have. If they didn't feel like it could work, at least we had been faithful.
Now we're into yesterday. I'm looking through the darn photo listing trying to figure out what kid to put on hold. Yes, it's excruciating. But I slowly came up with some criteria:
1)Scholarships! Since we have absolutely NO moolah in savings to help this procedure out, I narrowed it down to the kiddos with scholarships. Plus, a lot of the kids with scholarships have them because they are overlooked due to disabilities. Double whammy!
2)Young and/or special needs. This is because my girlies are such little mommies and, aside from the perfect match of Oksana and Vitya last year:(, they would feel much more like part of the family helping out if the child needed some helping out.
So I narrowed it down to two children...Bogdan, a 4 year old boy with some speech delay and Nadia who has cerebral palsy and is 6. I emailed New Horizons and shared EVERYTHING with them. Their advice was to go with Bogdan since he would be a little easier...especially since I already have little ones. I told them I'd think about it. I did not even feel right about saying, "Yeah, give me the easy kid.". But then, that little boy was such a cutie and so young. What a stinkin' struggle. I woke up early this morning begging God to make it clear which one we should host. I even said to Him, "I wish You would just pick for me. Don't make me pick.". But when 9:00 rolled around, He hadn't sent me a telegram, so I decided Jono would be more comfortable with a little boy. That was it. I couldn't think about it anymore and I put him on hold. Then, guess what? Twenty minutes later my phone rang and it was New Horizons. The message went something like this, "Hey Heather. We've had something come up. One of the special needs girls from Latvia just had her host family back out on her and all of the paperwork for Latvian kids is due today. If we don't get a new host family for her, she's gonna be pulled from the program. She's 4 years old and was born premature and suffers from a degree of fetal alcohol syndrome. Would you be interested?" Why am I always surprised when God answers prayers? Like I said, I'm quite ignorant sometimes. So God picked Liga for us. Check her out...
Presh, huh? Now, back to 1 Corinthians 2:14. It says, "The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned." God is so good to give me what I need to hear in His word at just the right time. I looked up the word "folly" in the dictionary, and it means "a foolish action, practice, idea; absurdity. Does that not describe exactly what first pops in your mind when you think of us doing this? Hmmm...example of absurdity:1)Adopting. In the words of one kind stranger, "It's just a lot of money to end up with a broken heart. Them orphan kids always end up breaking their parents' hearts." So sweet.
2)Adopting internationally AND inter-racially. Do you have any idea how many times I've heard, "Why not somewhere with white kids?"?
3)Hosting while broke and in the process of adopting.
And I won't even boggle your mind with all of the other absurd things God has rolling around in my mind. Let's just suffice it to say that someone looking at it with their natural eyes just can't accept it. It's a "foolish action and idea". But spiritually it makes sense. To God it makes sense.
If you would like to help get Liga to America this Christmas, click here to donate.
I know every time you hear from me it's asking for money, but all I know to do is throw it out there and see what God does.
Monday, October 25, 2010
Just Call Me Billy Mayes...
I interrupt this blog (that has been slightly neglected lately) to bring you an excellent opportunity!! I know you have been sitting around wondering, "How can I help those crazy Long's raise the $3200 that they need, like, now for their adoption?". Well, look no further. Now, I'm not much of a salesman. In fact I HATE trying to sell people stuff. But this is different. 1) Because desperate times call for desperate measures, and 2) Because the products that I'm about to push help feed hungry kids and orphans in Uganda and Haiti!! How awesome is that?!? What was that? Tell you more? Ok...here we go.
First up we have the super cool, beautiful, and unique Ugandan magazine necklaces...
First up we have the super cool, beautiful, and unique Ugandan magazine necklaces...
Purchase one of these for $25 and money will be donated to Amazima Ministries and the wonderful women of the Karamojong tribe. The Karamojong women create these beautiful necklaces by hand from recycled paper. The goal is to help these women maintain sustainable income for their families. Also, 50% of the profits will be sent to a feeding program in Uganda. Not to mention, $10 will go towards bringing my baby home:)
Next, we got lots of shirts. And not just any shirts. These babies raise awareness about the 147 million orphans in the world. I mean, that's a triple win: raise awareness, feed kids in Uganda/Haiti, and actually help bring a specific orphan into a family. It doesn't get any better than that, people.
Hello, pink henley. Don't you look both comfy and adorable:)...
Always wondering what to buy the athlete in your life? Why, a black, dry-weave athletic shirt of course...
My personal fav...
And for those chilly days, a long sleeved tee...
You should check out amazima.org, see the great work that they're doing, then get this shirt to support them...
Now, all the shirts pictured above are $35, and word is these baseball tees are the softest shirts in the world and fit great. But I can hear a few of you groaning..."$35? What do you think I am? A rich American with a roof over my head and plenty of food in my pantry that will spend $35 going to a movie and sitting on my rear eating popcorn and drinking a coke? Gimme a deal!"
Well, will do. Here's some $30 jewels (and they still do the triple play: help us, feed a kid in Africa, and be a voice for those without one)...
Hello, pink henley. Don't you look both comfy and adorable:)...Always wondering what to buy the athlete in your life? Why, a black, dry-weave athletic shirt of course...My personal fav...And for those chilly days, a long sleeved tee...You should check out amazima.org, see the great work that they're doing, then get this shirt to support them...Now, all the shirts pictured above are $35, and word is these baseball tees are the softest shirts in the world and fit great. But I can hear a few of you groaning..."$35? What do you think I am? A rich American with a roof over my head and plenty of food in my pantry that will spend $35 going to a movie and sitting on my rear eating popcorn and drinking a coke? Gimme a deal!"Well, will do. Here's some $30 jewels (and they still do the triple play: help us, feed a kid in Africa, and be a voice for those without one)...
And here's some that are only $25...
And,hey, for $20 let's get the kiddos involved. This cutie comes in hot pink or mint green and in sizes 2T or 3T...
And this long sleeved tee comes in 2T, 3T, & 4T...
And these come in youth sizes...
And last, but not least...actually, it's the most, there's this vintage zip-up hoodie for $50...
So, there you have it. That's what I'm hawking. And I'm doing it unashamedly, dog-gone-it. Lemme know if you're interested in anything or have any questions about any of the products. I know the pics are pretty small, so if there's one you kinda like but want a better view, just holla and I'll hook you up with a better lookie.
Hey, what was that? Did you guys just hear those jingle bells? Yup. Christmas is a-coming and when you start going haywire buying gifts, think of me:)
To place an order, just comment here on the blog, facebook me, or email me at sweetalana@gmail.com.
So, there you have it. That's what I'm hawking. And I'm doing it unashamedly, dog-gone-it. Lemme know if you're interested in anything or have any questions about any of the products. I know the pics are pretty small, so if there's one you kinda like but want a better view, just holla and I'll hook you up with a better lookie. Hey, what was that? Did you guys just hear those jingle bells? Yup. Christmas is a-coming and when you start going haywire buying gifts, think of me:)
To place an order, just comment here on the blog, facebook me, or email me at sweetalana@gmail.com.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Practice Hospitality
Have you ever had one of those days that just seem to have a theme? Well, that was today for me. The day could be summed up in one word...hospitality. And now, as I'm about to go to sleep, I'm quite amazed at how kind God is to give me "theme days". Really. Any one of the incidents may have only been chalked up as "interesting" to me, but all crammed into one day they are clearly a kick in the pants (in a gentle, God kind of way that is.).
It all started with an amazing new bible study that I started called "Get Uncomfortable" (by Todd Phillips and available at LifeWay if you're interested). In lesson 1 you're supposed to read through Romans chapter 12. Well, I did it and decided to make a list of the "to-do's" in that chapter. There were quite a few, and one of them is "practice hospitality." I took a moment and thought, "I want the Long's to be more hospitable." Good thought. The end.
Next, Jono and I were driving to an apartment complex were refugees from lots of countries have been placed by the United Nations. Our youth ministry is going there Saturday to take family photos and give them to the people...framed and free. Most of them don't have pics and it's a good way to get whole families out to meet them. So we were taking a group to pass out fliers advertising about the photo shoot. On the ride, I kinda threw out to Jono that I want us to be more hospitable. He agreed and before long we were vowing to open our home to others waaaaay more frequently. We even discussed how fast our grocery money seems to go and that, maybe, it doesn't seem like quite enough because pretty much 100% of it is spent on us. I wouldn't put it past God to make money supernaturally disappear because we're hoarding it. And I, quite frankly, don't blame Him either. Money has often been our excuse NOT to have people over more. Lame, I know. The convo ended. And theeeennnnn....
We get to the apartment complex, and an awesome man who has made it his ministry to reach out to these people is there and offers to take me on a few home visit with some Kareni families. I tried to keep the squealing and happy-dancing to a minimum, and off we went. These are people who, for the most part, don't speak English and have only been in the US for a year or less. They are brought over mostly because they have been kicked out of their countries due to ethnic cleansing. So they are in a culture they TOTALLY don't understand and have EXTREMELY little. Well, we are welcomed into our first apartment, we remove our shoes at the door, and then everyone sits down in a circle in the middle of the room. Furniture? Nope. Clean? Nope. Much conversation happening? Mega nope. We charaded ourselves through a couple of statements, but mostly just smiled and tried to learn how to say everyone's names correctly (which was mostly a fail for me). By the time we left apartment one, I was having a nervous breakdown. I was apologizing to my friend for being so awkward and not having a clue what to say or what to do and I promised him that I would get better. Then he enlightened me. "We're the only ones in the situation feeling like we need to talk and do something. Hospitality is such a big deal in their culture that just having someone in their home and being in each other's presence is priceless to them." Yes. There's that word again. This was probably the point at which I caught on to my lesson of the day. And it was all that was on my mind for the next few visits. Really, how many of us put off having people over because the house isn't clean enough or we're not quite finished pulling all of the decor together. "Once I get my house how I want it, we'll have people over all the time." I've said it before. When we do have people over, isn't it usually good friends and people that we're comfortable around? No awkward silences? Really, friends, America is a wonderful place to live, but our culture has stolen from us a beautiful gift. I left those apartments craving to be a part of a community where random people just walk into my house. Where I'm comfortable inviting someone who I have NEVER met before in and not having a clue what we'll do or what we'll talk about. Those people have less square footage than most of our master bedrooms, and had more visitors in their home today than most of us have had this whole year. Oh, and I forgot to mention that every time we went to a different apartment, some of the people that we had met at the last apartment would show up and just walk on in. I finally stopped asking, "Oh, do ya'll know each other?".
So I hope that my daughters look back over their childhood and remember our house being a place where hospitality was practiced. I hope that they understand that to "love your neighbor as yourself" means that our home is as much for others' use as it is for our own. And I hope that if their grocery envelope seems to be ever-empty, it will cross their minds to possibly spend more of that money on feeding others.
So, who wants to come over for dinner??? :)
It all started with an amazing new bible study that I started called "Get Uncomfortable" (by Todd Phillips and available at LifeWay if you're interested). In lesson 1 you're supposed to read through Romans chapter 12. Well, I did it and decided to make a list of the "to-do's" in that chapter. There were quite a few, and one of them is "practice hospitality." I took a moment and thought, "I want the Long's to be more hospitable." Good thought. The end.
Next, Jono and I were driving to an apartment complex were refugees from lots of countries have been placed by the United Nations. Our youth ministry is going there Saturday to take family photos and give them to the people...framed and free. Most of them don't have pics and it's a good way to get whole families out to meet them. So we were taking a group to pass out fliers advertising about the photo shoot. On the ride, I kinda threw out to Jono that I want us to be more hospitable. He agreed and before long we were vowing to open our home to others waaaaay more frequently. We even discussed how fast our grocery money seems to go and that, maybe, it doesn't seem like quite enough because pretty much 100% of it is spent on us. I wouldn't put it past God to make money supernaturally disappear because we're hoarding it. And I, quite frankly, don't blame Him either. Money has often been our excuse NOT to have people over more. Lame, I know. The convo ended. And theeeennnnn....
We get to the apartment complex, and an awesome man who has made it his ministry to reach out to these people is there and offers to take me on a few home visit with some Kareni families. I tried to keep the squealing and happy-dancing to a minimum, and off we went. These are people who, for the most part, don't speak English and have only been in the US for a year or less. They are brought over mostly because they have been kicked out of their countries due to ethnic cleansing. So they are in a culture they TOTALLY don't understand and have EXTREMELY little. Well, we are welcomed into our first apartment, we remove our shoes at the door, and then everyone sits down in a circle in the middle of the room. Furniture? Nope. Clean? Nope. Much conversation happening? Mega nope. We charaded ourselves through a couple of statements, but mostly just smiled and tried to learn how to say everyone's names correctly (which was mostly a fail for me). By the time we left apartment one, I was having a nervous breakdown. I was apologizing to my friend for being so awkward and not having a clue what to say or what to do and I promised him that I would get better. Then he enlightened me. "We're the only ones in the situation feeling like we need to talk and do something. Hospitality is such a big deal in their culture that just having someone in their home and being in each other's presence is priceless to them." Yes. There's that word again. This was probably the point at which I caught on to my lesson of the day. And it was all that was on my mind for the next few visits. Really, how many of us put off having people over because the house isn't clean enough or we're not quite finished pulling all of the decor together. "Once I get my house how I want it, we'll have people over all the time." I've said it before. When we do have people over, isn't it usually good friends and people that we're comfortable around? No awkward silences? Really, friends, America is a wonderful place to live, but our culture has stolen from us a beautiful gift. I left those apartments craving to be a part of a community where random people just walk into my house. Where I'm comfortable inviting someone who I have NEVER met before in and not having a clue what we'll do or what we'll talk about. Those people have less square footage than most of our master bedrooms, and had more visitors in their home today than most of us have had this whole year. Oh, and I forgot to mention that every time we went to a different apartment, some of the people that we had met at the last apartment would show up and just walk on in. I finally stopped asking, "Oh, do ya'll know each other?".
So I hope that my daughters look back over their childhood and remember our house being a place where hospitality was practiced. I hope that they understand that to "love your neighbor as yourself" means that our home is as much for others' use as it is for our own. And I hope that if their grocery envelope seems to be ever-empty, it will cross their minds to possibly spend more of that money on feeding others.
So, who wants to come over for dinner??? :)
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Dear, Women...Love, Titus
Something that I hope that my girls "get" (even before they are adults) is the importance of the command in Titus 2:3-5:
If you're a Christian, and you're a woman, you're older than somebody. If you're not teaching and pouring into a "younger woman", not only are you being disobedient, you're helping create a whole generation of women who will just flounder around in the areas of being a wife and mother and godly woman.
Every Sunday morning at 9am, I meet with a group of 11th and 12th grade girls and we study and debate and struggle through the hard words of Jesus together. I've been meeting with this exact group of girls on a weekly basis since they were in 6th grade. Now, I and they will admit that I'm no Beth Moore. But I am older. And that seems to be the only requirement in this verse. It doesn't say the older, wise, super-duper godly women. Just the older. And I figure we can all approach it one of two ways:
1) Maybe when you were their age (whatever "they" is younger than you), you were close to God and you stood strong and you know all the struggles that they will experience and you can coach them on how to live as you did. There's an older lady in my life like that. She's an amazing mom who, I'm pretty sure, has never raised her voice at her kids. Ever. To her I often say, "How are you like that?!?".
2) Maybe when you were their age you screwed up in every possible way that you can. There's lots of times that I tell my small group a "Here's how not to handle that situation...believe me...I know" story. I say wisdom is learning from other people's mistakes so that you don't make the same ones.
Regardless of your approach, these are some necessary relationships that need to be happening within the body of Christ. I think that my 11th and 12th graders need to be teaching and pouring into some middle schoolers (which, I'm proud to say, they are), and some middle schoolers need to be talking about God to some elementary aged girls, and I even tell my 6 and 4 year old daughters every Sunday that they need to look for someone that they can teach about Jesus. Sometimes they'll say, "But our teachers are teaching them. Why do we have to?". But I want it to be ingrained in them so that they will always be women who play a part in passing on the legacy of godliness to the next generation of girls.
The lie that you have to be some old sage of a woman and bake your own bread and call your husband "my lord" is from Satan. I think he's had too many of us fooled and talked out of this responsibility and it shows in our "christian women culture."
So, find you some younger girls and dig in. And if you have daughters of your own, go ahead and start getting them in on this. Otherwise they'll be thirty-something thinking, "One day when I'm a little older and wiser, maybe I'll do that Titus 2 thing..."
"Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled."
If you're a Christian, and you're a woman, you're older than somebody. If you're not teaching and pouring into a "younger woman", not only are you being disobedient, you're helping create a whole generation of women who will just flounder around in the areas of being a wife and mother and godly woman.
Every Sunday morning at 9am, I meet with a group of 11th and 12th grade girls and we study and debate and struggle through the hard words of Jesus together. I've been meeting with this exact group of girls on a weekly basis since they were in 6th grade. Now, I and they will admit that I'm no Beth Moore. But I am older. And that seems to be the only requirement in this verse. It doesn't say the older, wise, super-duper godly women. Just the older. And I figure we can all approach it one of two ways:
1) Maybe when you were their age (whatever "they" is younger than you), you were close to God and you stood strong and you know all the struggles that they will experience and you can coach them on how to live as you did. There's an older lady in my life like that. She's an amazing mom who, I'm pretty sure, has never raised her voice at her kids. Ever. To her I often say, "How are you like that?!?".
2) Maybe when you were their age you screwed up in every possible way that you can. There's lots of times that I tell my small group a "Here's how not to handle that situation...believe me...I know" story. I say wisdom is learning from other people's mistakes so that you don't make the same ones.
Regardless of your approach, these are some necessary relationships that need to be happening within the body of Christ. I think that my 11th and 12th graders need to be teaching and pouring into some middle schoolers (which, I'm proud to say, they are), and some middle schoolers need to be talking about God to some elementary aged girls, and I even tell my 6 and 4 year old daughters every Sunday that they need to look for someone that they can teach about Jesus. Sometimes they'll say, "But our teachers are teaching them. Why do we have to?". But I want it to be ingrained in them so that they will always be women who play a part in passing on the legacy of godliness to the next generation of girls.
The lie that you have to be some old sage of a woman and bake your own bread and call your husband "my lord" is from Satan. I think he's had too many of us fooled and talked out of this responsibility and it shows in our "christian women culture."
So, find you some younger girls and dig in. And if you have daughters of your own, go ahead and start getting them in on this. Otherwise they'll be thirty-something thinking, "One day when I'm a little older and wiser, maybe I'll do that Titus 2 thing..."
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
No-Spending Days
So we Long's are really trying to live more simply. We're getting rid of a lot of stuff (as I've mentioned in previous posts), and working towards having a bigger giving budget. It seems like every day one of us calls or texts the other with some new "lets get rid of it" idea or "what if we..." comment. It starts getting pretty crazy when you become convinced that Jesus REALLY meant to "love others as you love yourself". I don't say that to sound holier-than-thou or anything. I mean, we're still spoiled rotten when we think about it. But when you start cutting those strings that "stuff" and "wealth" have on your heart, you start experiencing moments of freedom and it gets downright addicting. Sooo...
My challenge to my family and yours is this:
Go 4 days a week without spending any money.
Is that extreme? It's really not so much to me since I'm at home doing school with my girls Monday through Thursday anyway. I seldom leave the house on those days, and if I do it's for an appointment or something. Definitely not to go shopping with the munchkins. But there is the occasional night run to the grocery store or Jono eating lunch out with someone. And you know how the "I'm just running in to get some milk" can turn into "well, the fall scented candles were on sale...".
We usually do our grocery shopping together on the weekends anyway, and if I have somewhere else I want to go, it's usually on the weekend too since that's when Jono's off and can either keep the kids at home or at least go with me to help control the chaos. So really, it may only mean a few breadless days for me and planning meetings after lunchtime for Jono (when he can get away with just ordering a water?). A small sacrifice that has the potential to keep a few extra buckaroos from disappearing.
Maybe you're not at home the majority of your week and going 4 days without spending a dime seems catastrophic. Do 3. Or 2. Or even 1. It's baby steps. Just skipping your usual Starbucks run one day a week can mean $20 extra you have at the end of the month to give to an awesome ministry you know of or to a person or family in need. That seems like a pretty good trade to me.
P.S. As of today, our 2 vehicles are on Craigslist. Jono's gonna get a cluncker (unless I can talk him into just getting a bike) since he works 1.5 minutes from our house, and I'm getting an older van with fewer little buttons that do wonderful things like open and close doors. Oh well...it's just a car right?
My challenge to my family and yours is this:
Go 4 days a week without spending any money.
Is that extreme? It's really not so much to me since I'm at home doing school with my girls Monday through Thursday anyway. I seldom leave the house on those days, and if I do it's for an appointment or something. Definitely not to go shopping with the munchkins. But there is the occasional night run to the grocery store or Jono eating lunch out with someone. And you know how the "I'm just running in to get some milk" can turn into "well, the fall scented candles were on sale...".
We usually do our grocery shopping together on the weekends anyway, and if I have somewhere else I want to go, it's usually on the weekend too since that's when Jono's off and can either keep the kids at home or at least go with me to help control the chaos. So really, it may only mean a few breadless days for me and planning meetings after lunchtime for Jono (when he can get away with just ordering a water?). A small sacrifice that has the potential to keep a few extra buckaroos from disappearing.
Maybe you're not at home the majority of your week and going 4 days without spending a dime seems catastrophic. Do 3. Or 2. Or even 1. It's baby steps. Just skipping your usual Starbucks run one day a week can mean $20 extra you have at the end of the month to give to an awesome ministry you know of or to a person or family in need. That seems like a pretty good trade to me.
P.S. As of today, our 2 vehicles are on Craigslist. Jono's gonna get a cluncker (unless I can talk him into just getting a bike) since he works 1.5 minutes from our house, and I'm getting an older van with fewer little buttons that do wonderful things like open and close doors. Oh well...it's just a car right?
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Spoiling the Sick
Today Nevaeh woke up with a fever and a tummy ache. I absolutely hate it when my babies are sick. Not just because I know that it means more whining and higher maintenance, but just knowing that their little bodies are struggling makes me woozy. Well, I had the realization that many moms probably had much earlier on in their motherhood. I am officially at a stage in life where the thought of getting sick has absolutely NO benefits. I remember when I was in school hoping that I'd catch a bug so I could stay home in bed all day and watch tv. Even as a newlywed I was ok with coming down with something because it meant I could justify ignoring my endless to-do list and just chill for a day. Now, I know most moms say that that all ended the second they had kids, but it didn't end for me until Memaw passed away. Because while she was alive, it was still kinda fun to get sick. The second she heard that I wasn't feeling well she would hightail it over to my house, bathe and dress the kids, fix us all lunch, take the kids outside for a walk or to play, bring them in and read them a book, put them down for a nap, clean my house, then sit on the sofa with me and watch some Lifetime Movie or Oprah. It was supa fun.
But today as I thought about possibly getting the bug that Vaeh has, I was filled with horror. Getting sick means nothing now except that I'll be extra miserable while cooking, feeding kids, dressing kids, changing diapers, and teaching the girls. The perks are over.
So I vowed that I would make an effort to always bestow blessings on the sick in my family, and you should do the same. Whether it's our hubbies or our kids, we should be an angel of healing to them, bearing soup and juice and remote controls. Sometimes it's hard because, as busy wives and moms, we don't have time to deal with whiny men/kids. "Just lay down and be quiet so I can accomplish my goals for the day." But I say, go out of your way to spoil a sick person silly, even if it means putting everything on hold for a day. It will probably, like, cut the healing time in half. And don't we all miss those days?
Now, if you are one of my precious girls reading this in the future, I hope that you can't say that you miss it because even when you're grown I plan on swooping in and saving the virus-infected day. I hope that when all of the moms around you are complaining about how terrible it is to be sick, you are secretly hoping for a little cold to come your way just so you can be spoiled for a day by your Momma.
But today as I thought about possibly getting the bug that Vaeh has, I was filled with horror. Getting sick means nothing now except that I'll be extra miserable while cooking, feeding kids, dressing kids, changing diapers, and teaching the girls. The perks are over.
So I vowed that I would make an effort to always bestow blessings on the sick in my family, and you should do the same. Whether it's our hubbies or our kids, we should be an angel of healing to them, bearing soup and juice and remote controls. Sometimes it's hard because, as busy wives and moms, we don't have time to deal with whiny men/kids. "Just lay down and be quiet so I can accomplish my goals for the day." But I say, go out of your way to spoil a sick person silly, even if it means putting everything on hold for a day. It will probably, like, cut the healing time in half. And don't we all miss those days?
Now, if you are one of my precious girls reading this in the future, I hope that you can't say that you miss it because even when you're grown I plan on swooping in and saving the virus-infected day. I hope that when all of the moms around you are complaining about how terrible it is to be sick, you are secretly hoping for a little cold to come your way just so you can be spoiled for a day by your Momma.
Friday, September 17, 2010
The Fifth Wall
Today I did something that I've been wanting to do for a long time but just haven't gotten around to it. I've always loved the concept of painting the ceiling in a room to make it feel more complete. Unfortunately all of the ceilings in my house have that terrible, starburst bumpy stuff on them, and the ugliness of that has just unmotivated me to pay them any attention. I mean, really. That has to be just a lazy, construction guy solution. No interior designer was like, "Hmmm. Those ceilings just look too clean and sharp. I know! Hey, hand me that sponge and some sheetrock mud. I'm gonna add some pizazz!".
But we are transforming a previous junk room/office/boy's bedroom into Alana's bedroom, and I realized something...her room is the ONLY room in the house with a nice, smooth finish. So I decided to christen my abode with a painted ceiling. Finally. And I must admit that it's cute as pie. I chose a very light, airy blue so that it almost looks like you're looking up at the sky. We all love it. All it cost is $20 for the paint, and I have lots left over that I'm thinking about using in our baby girl's room who will be coming soon. And it only took me 2 hours to cut in and do 2 coats all by myself with 3 kids constantly swarming around me. So that tells you it's fairly simple. I'm even talking myself into painting the ceiling in my guest bathroom, even though it's bumpy. I'm just gonna try using one of those rollers for textured surfaces. I may regret it...but we'll see.
So, pick a room, a super light color, and show some love to that fifth wall. Especially if you're blessed enough to have some sparkling white crown molding. It'll really make it pop.
Disclaimer: My arms and neck are-how should I put it-KILLING ME, but I'm trying to think of it as a good thing. Like when you're sore after working out. So, it's a bonus. P90X ceiling painting.
But we are transforming a previous junk room/office/boy's bedroom into Alana's bedroom, and I realized something...her room is the ONLY room in the house with a nice, smooth finish. So I decided to christen my abode with a painted ceiling. Finally. And I must admit that it's cute as pie. I chose a very light, airy blue so that it almost looks like you're looking up at the sky. We all love it. All it cost is $20 for the paint, and I have lots left over that I'm thinking about using in our baby girl's room who will be coming soon. And it only took me 2 hours to cut in and do 2 coats all by myself with 3 kids constantly swarming around me. So that tells you it's fairly simple. I'm even talking myself into painting the ceiling in my guest bathroom, even though it's bumpy. I'm just gonna try using one of those rollers for textured surfaces. I may regret it...but we'll see.
So, pick a room, a super light color, and show some love to that fifth wall. Especially if you're blessed enough to have some sparkling white crown molding. It'll really make it pop.
Disclaimer: My arms and neck are-how should I put it-KILLING ME, but I'm trying to think of it as a good thing. Like when you're sore after working out. So, it's a bonus. P90X ceiling painting.
Thursday, September 16, 2010
No "Know-It-All's"
I'm pretty sure that one of the most obnoxious characteristics that someone can have is being an unteachable know-it-all. It drives me (and everyone else around them) crazy, and ensures that they will never grow and learn and improve. So one of the biggest hopes that I have for my girls is that they would be learners. Figure out what all of the important aspects of your life are and then figure out how you can learn more about it and get better at it.
Today I woke up at 4:30 am (uuugggghhh), loaded up with Jono and some dear friends, and drove to Newspring Church in South Carolina to a church leadership conference. I must admit, Jono and I are conference junkies. We absolutely looove gleaning from the likes of Francis Chan, Perry Noble, Andy Stanley, Steven Furtick and Judah Smith. It was so much fun and literally like trying to drink from a fire hydrant. We spent the whole ride home discussing all of our take-away nuggets and how we hoped to implement them.
Maybe you're not into "church leadership". We also go to youth ministry conferences and children ministry conferences. But from reading books on parenting to listening to podcasts about marraige, there are always ways to broaden those horizons and keep the ol' think tank chuggin'. It just doesn't make sense to me to stop learning about things that are important to you. And, since we're all super busy, it takes some creativity to find the time to read or listen or attend. But this is me saying that it's worth it. You become better at what you do. You allow yourself to dream a little bigger. You get re-inspired and re-energized.
And while all the know-it-all's of the world are talking about why what they think is so right, you'll be the one just rockin' at what you do and loving it.
Today I woke up at 4:30 am (uuugggghhh), loaded up with Jono and some dear friends, and drove to Newspring Church in South Carolina to a church leadership conference. I must admit, Jono and I are conference junkies. We absolutely looove gleaning from the likes of Francis Chan, Perry Noble, Andy Stanley, Steven Furtick and Judah Smith. It was so much fun and literally like trying to drink from a fire hydrant. We spent the whole ride home discussing all of our take-away nuggets and how we hoped to implement them.
Maybe you're not into "church leadership". We also go to youth ministry conferences and children ministry conferences. But from reading books on parenting to listening to podcasts about marraige, there are always ways to broaden those horizons and keep the ol' think tank chuggin'. It just doesn't make sense to me to stop learning about things that are important to you. And, since we're all super busy, it takes some creativity to find the time to read or listen or attend. But this is me saying that it's worth it. You become better at what you do. You allow yourself to dream a little bigger. You get re-inspired and re-energized.
And while all the know-it-all's of the world are talking about why what they think is so right, you'll be the one just rockin' at what you do and loving it.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
EAT
Ok. I promise I'll try to take a longer break from food related rantings after this one, but it was something that hit me today and I thought, "By golly, I'm passing that on to my girls."
Eat.
That's it. Just eat. I found myself feeling tired and blah and all shaky today and then realized that I had eaten....hmmm...NOTHING! It was about 4:00 and somehow I had gone the whole day without being struck by the notion to eat. And after I thought about it for a minute I remembered that I had done the same thing practically all week. I don't know what my deal is. I think it's partly just being busy with doing school and taking care of kids. Some of it may be my psychosis and fear of gaining weight, but probably not really that much. I like food too much to consciously turn it down. A lot of it is also probably that it is the end of our pay month and the money in the grocery envelope is g.o.n.e. And in our cash-only household, when it's gone it's gone. So there just hasn't been much around that has caught my eye. But I decided tonight that a chubby, full Mommy/wifey is much nicer and more fun and pleasant to be around than an anemic, low blood sugar one. So I have vowed to eat. For the sake of my dear children and sweet hubby and my own sanity, I will be partaking of food more regularly. And, assuming that my girls get my same genes, I can freely pass that advice on to them. I've always loved food and have somehow avoided ever being extremely overweight (other than during pregnancy), so I choose to chow...and so should you.
Everyone's a better version of themselves with food in their belly.
Oh, and for the record, I realize that my blog needs some remodeling, but I just haven't had the time to do it yet. Plus I'm super technologically challenged. So hopefully I will talk my dear Jono into helping me pretty it up soon. And I'll update the title to better represent what I'm blogging about now. It's on the to-do list...
Eat.
That's it. Just eat. I found myself feeling tired and blah and all shaky today and then realized that I had eaten....hmmm...NOTHING! It was about 4:00 and somehow I had gone the whole day without being struck by the notion to eat. And after I thought about it for a minute I remembered that I had done the same thing practically all week. I don't know what my deal is. I think it's partly just being busy with doing school and taking care of kids. Some of it may be my psychosis and fear of gaining weight, but probably not really that much. I like food too much to consciously turn it down. A lot of it is also probably that it is the end of our pay month and the money in the grocery envelope is g.o.n.e. And in our cash-only household, when it's gone it's gone. So there just hasn't been much around that has caught my eye. But I decided tonight that a chubby, full Mommy/wifey is much nicer and more fun and pleasant to be around than an anemic, low blood sugar one. So I have vowed to eat. For the sake of my dear children and sweet hubby and my own sanity, I will be partaking of food more regularly. And, assuming that my girls get my same genes, I can freely pass that advice on to them. I've always loved food and have somehow avoided ever being extremely overweight (other than during pregnancy), so I choose to chow...and so should you.
Everyone's a better version of themselves with food in their belly.
Oh, and for the record, I realize that my blog needs some remodeling, but I just haven't had the time to do it yet. Plus I'm super technologically challenged. So hopefully I will talk my dear Jono into helping me pretty it up soon. And I'll update the title to better represent what I'm blogging about now. It's on the to-do list...
Monday, September 13, 2010
How Might We Simplify???
Before I get into my "insight of the day", I gotta give a quick shout out to my awesome Jono for pulling off an AMAZING anniversary weekend! For posterity's sake, here's a rundown of what he cooked up for me:
1) He told me Thursday morning to pack an overnight bag. No clues, just the promise of a childless night's sleep.
2) After dropping the kids off at his aunt's house, he took me to Mary Mac's Tea Room in Atlanta for the most delish and filling dinner I think I have ever had. We have been wanting to check it out for quite a while now, and let's just say it didn't disappoint.
3) Then he drove me down many mysterious (read:sketchy) roads until we came to...The Starlight Drive-In Movie Theater!!!! This has been a dream of mine for. ever. In fact, the way my dear Jono proposed to me was by setting up our own drive-in theater out in the woods. We watched "Inception" which was good / a little brain tiring.
4) We finished off the night by checking into the Hyatt which, as I mentioned before, assured us of a whole night without a certain four year old climbing in bed with us.
5) Friday, we got out of bed at around ten o'clock (yesssss!), got dressed, and proceeded to hit up every store in the Atlanta/Buckhead area that I've been wanting to shop at. Most of them were at Atlantic Station (I think I could live there...minus the cost of living), and of course we made the obligatory stop at IKEA!!!
So that was our fun and exciting "9 years of love and fun" celebration. Now on to insightful things. Every now and then, have the "how can we simplify" talk. With your hubby if you're married and with yourself if you're not. Tonight when Jono got home from work, the girls and I were cleaning their room and we had a bag that we were putting stuff in that we/they wanted to give away to some of the refugee kids that we visit. I know, we just had a yard sale. But I'm on a SIMPLIFY kick. And I had been thinking all day, "What can we do without? What are we spending money on that we could nix and create some margin as well as up our giving?". Well, clearly this was a place that God had led my thinking, because as soon as Jono saw us he said, "I've been thinking all day that we need to find some stuff to give away...I just wanna simplify." So we started evaluating everything.
Before I share all the ideas that we came up with, I think it's important to say a couple of things. First of all, I am not one of those people who are like, "Oh, you have a tv in your house? We don't own one of those terrible contraptions.". In fact, that person always gets on my nerves. So the ways that we may choose to simplify may not be the ways that you choose to, and that's cool with me. I am not the "You're living too extravagantly" police. On the flip side of that (actually, I don't know if it's on the flip side, but whatever), just because I feel led or convicted to make one change doesn't give everyone else the right to point out, "Well, if you're gonna do that, then shouldn't you do this too?". For instance, me deciding to give up acrylic nails in no way opens the door for someone to say, "So, I guess since you're being so holy you're not ever gonna color your hair again either.". Can't we all just be excited for each other's baby steps and not expect one little sacrifice to immediately turn into moving to Africa to live in a hut? (which, by the way, I would do in a heartbeat).
Ok. So back to the talk. It takes a lot of intentionality to come up with things you can give up, because we are immersed among people who actually have MORE than us. The initial thought is that we should not be getting rid of stuff, but figuring out how we can save up to send our kids to gymnastics (because every other kid in the world is signed up for something, right?) or get a new stainless steel fridge because our old black and white one that came used with the house is just embarrassing. But if you dig past that gut level, and stop comparing yourself to the bubble of rich people that you're surrounded by (which, by the way, American=rich), you can probably find a few things.
First of all, we decided to change our satellite package to the cheapest one that only includes the local channels. Right now, we only have the one right above that, and since we don't have HGTV or TLC now, it's not much of a sacrifice to me. Jono's actually gonna check on us getting rid of the satellite all together and buying a hi def antenna. Then we'd have no more money spent on the tube each month!
Second, I brought up the car issue. I am really not a car person, evidenced by my driving a minivan. I have never had the need to have a cool looking car. I just want a big one that I can cram all my kiddos in that works. It doesn't even have to have a/c. I've been driving around without that since August. So I asked Jono if he would look to see if there is a mini out there that would cost less than the one we have now. This is sort of a sacrifice to me because I do love all my buttons that make loading up a little easier. Both sliding doors and the trunk will open and close with the press of a button which is wonderful when you're coming out of the grocery store pushing a buggy and carrying a baby and dragging a whiny kid. I know that by going cheaper that I'll probably lose those features, but I keep reminding myself that I'm in the top 2% of wealthiest people in the world just by having a vehicle at all. It's a constant perspective check.
I then proceeded to tread on Jono's territory and said that we are paying too much for him a car when he works less than 1 minute from his place of employment. I even think that we could pull off being a one-car family. Can you imagine the money we could save?! On days like yesterday when I was home all day, he could have the van. If I was going to need it, we could all just load up and run Daddy to work. Or he could walk, which he scoffs at. Usually if he goes anywhere during the day it's with someone, so he could catch a ride. Anyway, I'm not sure that I've talked him into that yet, but he is going to look into trading down both of our cars.
Me and my girls agreed that from now on every time we go visit our sweet refugee friends that we will take them a gift. A toy, some clothes, a jacket...something. God didn't give us all this stuff to hoard, right?
I even mentioned during our talk the possibility of downsizing our house. I've always been convinced that one day we would upgrade, but lately God has changed my heart on that. I've stopped wishing for a bigger kitchen or a finished basement. And then tonight during our convo, I was like, "Hey, what if we sold our house and got an older, smaller one?". Jono didn't seem to think that we could make that big of a difference, and plus we really have to stay true to our home study for now anyway. But I'm just excited that I have grown from being discontent with my house and wanting more to being willing to live in less. That's a HUUUUGE step of growth for me.
And, back to the hair thing, I AM going naturale this fall and winter to save some money. And everytime I look in the mirror and think "BLAH", I'll remind myself that all these little changes are making it possible for us to have a bigger giving budget. That really does make it worth it.
1) He told me Thursday morning to pack an overnight bag. No clues, just the promise of a childless night's sleep.
2) After dropping the kids off at his aunt's house, he took me to Mary Mac's Tea Room in Atlanta for the most delish and filling dinner I think I have ever had. We have been wanting to check it out for quite a while now, and let's just say it didn't disappoint.
3) Then he drove me down many mysterious (read:sketchy) roads until we came to...The Starlight Drive-In Movie Theater!!!! This has been a dream of mine for. ever. In fact, the way my dear Jono proposed to me was by setting up our own drive-in theater out in the woods. We watched "Inception" which was good / a little brain tiring.
4) We finished off the night by checking into the Hyatt which, as I mentioned before, assured us of a whole night without a certain four year old climbing in bed with us.
5) Friday, we got out of bed at around ten o'clock (yesssss!), got dressed, and proceeded to hit up every store in the Atlanta/Buckhead area that I've been wanting to shop at. Most of them were at Atlantic Station (I think I could live there...minus the cost of living), and of course we made the obligatory stop at IKEA!!!
So that was our fun and exciting "9 years of love and fun" celebration. Now on to insightful things. Every now and then, have the "how can we simplify" talk. With your hubby if you're married and with yourself if you're not. Tonight when Jono got home from work, the girls and I were cleaning their room and we had a bag that we were putting stuff in that we/they wanted to give away to some of the refugee kids that we visit. I know, we just had a yard sale. But I'm on a SIMPLIFY kick. And I had been thinking all day, "What can we do without? What are we spending money on that we could nix and create some margin as well as up our giving?". Well, clearly this was a place that God had led my thinking, because as soon as Jono saw us he said, "I've been thinking all day that we need to find some stuff to give away...I just wanna simplify." So we started evaluating everything.
Before I share all the ideas that we came up with, I think it's important to say a couple of things. First of all, I am not one of those people who are like, "Oh, you have a tv in your house? We don't own one of those terrible contraptions.". In fact, that person always gets on my nerves. So the ways that we may choose to simplify may not be the ways that you choose to, and that's cool with me. I am not the "You're living too extravagantly" police. On the flip side of that (actually, I don't know if it's on the flip side, but whatever), just because I feel led or convicted to make one change doesn't give everyone else the right to point out, "Well, if you're gonna do that, then shouldn't you do this too?". For instance, me deciding to give up acrylic nails in no way opens the door for someone to say, "So, I guess since you're being so holy you're not ever gonna color your hair again either.". Can't we all just be excited for each other's baby steps and not expect one little sacrifice to immediately turn into moving to Africa to live in a hut? (which, by the way, I would do in a heartbeat).
Ok. So back to the talk. It takes a lot of intentionality to come up with things you can give up, because we are immersed among people who actually have MORE than us. The initial thought is that we should not be getting rid of stuff, but figuring out how we can save up to send our kids to gymnastics (because every other kid in the world is signed up for something, right?) or get a new stainless steel fridge because our old black and white one that came used with the house is just embarrassing. But if you dig past that gut level, and stop comparing yourself to the bubble of rich people that you're surrounded by (which, by the way, American=rich), you can probably find a few things.
First of all, we decided to change our satellite package to the cheapest one that only includes the local channels. Right now, we only have the one right above that, and since we don't have HGTV or TLC now, it's not much of a sacrifice to me. Jono's actually gonna check on us getting rid of the satellite all together and buying a hi def antenna. Then we'd have no more money spent on the tube each month!
Second, I brought up the car issue. I am really not a car person, evidenced by my driving a minivan. I have never had the need to have a cool looking car. I just want a big one that I can cram all my kiddos in that works. It doesn't even have to have a/c. I've been driving around without that since August. So I asked Jono if he would look to see if there is a mini out there that would cost less than the one we have now. This is sort of a sacrifice to me because I do love all my buttons that make loading up a little easier. Both sliding doors and the trunk will open and close with the press of a button which is wonderful when you're coming out of the grocery store pushing a buggy and carrying a baby and dragging a whiny kid. I know that by going cheaper that I'll probably lose those features, but I keep reminding myself that I'm in the top 2% of wealthiest people in the world just by having a vehicle at all. It's a constant perspective check.
I then proceeded to tread on Jono's territory and said that we are paying too much for him a car when he works less than 1 minute from his place of employment. I even think that we could pull off being a one-car family. Can you imagine the money we could save?! On days like yesterday when I was home all day, he could have the van. If I was going to need it, we could all just load up and run Daddy to work. Or he could walk, which he scoffs at. Usually if he goes anywhere during the day it's with someone, so he could catch a ride. Anyway, I'm not sure that I've talked him into that yet, but he is going to look into trading down both of our cars.
Me and my girls agreed that from now on every time we go visit our sweet refugee friends that we will take them a gift. A toy, some clothes, a jacket...something. God didn't give us all this stuff to hoard, right?
I even mentioned during our talk the possibility of downsizing our house. I've always been convinced that one day we would upgrade, but lately God has changed my heart on that. I've stopped wishing for a bigger kitchen or a finished basement. And then tonight during our convo, I was like, "Hey, what if we sold our house and got an older, smaller one?". Jono didn't seem to think that we could make that big of a difference, and plus we really have to stay true to our home study for now anyway. But I'm just excited that I have grown from being discontent with my house and wanting more to being willing to live in less. That's a HUUUUGE step of growth for me.
And, back to the hair thing, I AM going naturale this fall and winter to save some money. And everytime I look in the mirror and think "BLAH", I'll remind myself that all these little changes are making it possible for us to have a bigger giving budget. That really does make it worth it.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
On the Fence about Flowers
Alright. When it comes to flowers from my hubs, I have quite a mixed philosophy. There's part of me-we'll call it "Cheapskate"-that immediately wonders how much he spent on them and then thinks about the things I could have bought for that amount that would not die in a week. Then there's the other part of me-we'll call this one "Romantic"-that is just not willing to give up the notion of a surprise bouquet. Now, I've never fully talked this out with my dear Jono, but it seems that he has picked up on my flower quirkiness and found the perfect middle ground. Today, which by the way is our 9 year anniversary, he popped home for a minute from work to deliver a fresh bunch of buds to me. They were winners! No, it wasn't 9 red roses. I love roses, but I'm always drawn to those mixed bouquets that have lots of colors and different flowers. And that's exactly what it was. There were a couple of roses, some daisies, chrysanthemums, and some other flower and really cool greenery that I have no idea what they are. It was great because the Cheapo part of me didn't kick in since it wasn't a huge "Flowers R Us" rose presentation. In fact, for the sake of this post, I asked Jono to reveal the price. After much promising that the cheaper they were, the more wonderful of a gift they are he told me that they were just $10!! Now that's romance-that-will-die-in-a-week I can handle. And they're so bright and colorful and happy!
Now here's my trick to always making these cheaper bouquets look their best. For some reason, most people get a bunch of flowers, grab a vase big enough to hold the bunch, and stick them all in. This works sometimes, but I much prefer to find a bunch of my smaller vases and distribute all those little flowers around. They look better because they aren't all crammed together and those non-rose, small buds seem to stand out more when they're cut down a little shorter. Plus, more rooms in your house get to be graced by their presence. So, for $10 I now have 4 arrangements (which reside by my kitchen sink, on my pub table, in my living room, and in the guest bathroom) instead of one. It just makes me wanna sing!!
So there you have it. Unless you just can't appreciate a flower that isn't a rose, save a bundle of money and go for those mixed, grocery store bouquets. Split 'em up and it'll look like you just went for a walk through a meadow with your basket and collected them yourself!!
And, since I'm hoping that my girls are reading this one day in their twenties, I thought it would be neat to mention how in love I am with my Jono on our 9 year anniversary. Since it fell on a Wednesday and he had to teach, our surprise festivities begin tomorrow afternoon. But I made him an adorable (read:embarrassing) little badge to wear at church that said: "Heather's Hubby: 9 years of marital bliss. 09-08-01". It may have even had a little glitter on it. Of course he cringed, but it's kind of a tradition for me to make him wear some ooshy-gooshy thing on our anniversary. But we are madly in love and the best of friends. My babies may have weird parents, but they at least have parents that love each other like crazy. And I'm seeing more and more that that is not as common as it should be.
Now here's my trick to always making these cheaper bouquets look their best. For some reason, most people get a bunch of flowers, grab a vase big enough to hold the bunch, and stick them all in. This works sometimes, but I much prefer to find a bunch of my smaller vases and distribute all those little flowers around. They look better because they aren't all crammed together and those non-rose, small buds seem to stand out more when they're cut down a little shorter. Plus, more rooms in your house get to be graced by their presence. So, for $10 I now have 4 arrangements (which reside by my kitchen sink, on my pub table, in my living room, and in the guest bathroom) instead of one. It just makes me wanna sing!!
So there you have it. Unless you just can't appreciate a flower that isn't a rose, save a bundle of money and go for those mixed, grocery store bouquets. Split 'em up and it'll look like you just went for a walk through a meadow with your basket and collected them yourself!!
And, since I'm hoping that my girls are reading this one day in their twenties, I thought it would be neat to mention how in love I am with my Jono on our 9 year anniversary. Since it fell on a Wednesday and he had to teach, our surprise festivities begin tomorrow afternoon. But I made him an adorable (read:embarrassing) little badge to wear at church that said: "Heather's Hubby: 9 years of marital bliss. 09-08-01". It may have even had a little glitter on it. Of course he cringed, but it's kind of a tradition for me to make him wear some ooshy-gooshy thing on our anniversary. But we are madly in love and the best of friends. My babies may have weird parents, but they at least have parents that love each other like crazy. And I'm seeing more and more that that is not as common as it should be.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
"Purge the Kitchen Week"
I realize that this is the third post in a row about food. What can I say? I like to eat.
Every now and then, to test your creativity, you should resist restocking the ol' pantry and fridge and see how long you can create meals out of all of the random things that have been sitting in there forever. Dinner may look a little funny...frozen corn, wild rice pilaf, and turkey sandwiches. Or maybe baked beans, alfredo noodles, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Regardless, it's fun to stretch your grocery money an extra week and start seeing some empty shelves in your pantry/fridge/freezer. Plus you find the things that it's time to throw away or maybe donate to a local food pantry. If you're not willing to eat it during "purge the kitchen week", you're probably never gonna eat it.
Tonight was nearing the end of said week at the Long house, and there was hardly a side to be found to go with our leftover bbq sandwiches. I'm proud to say that my dear family didn't voice one complaint at the white rice that I served alongside it. And then we had a bowl of muscadines for dessert. I was just determined to get another meal or two out of what we have. It may have something to do with my aversion to grocery shopping on beautiful days like we've been having. But whatever the reason, our bellies are full and my cupboards are quite bare. And I love seeing empty spaces in my house. There's just something relieving to me about it:)
Every now and then, to test your creativity, you should resist restocking the ol' pantry and fridge and see how long you can create meals out of all of the random things that have been sitting in there forever. Dinner may look a little funny...frozen corn, wild rice pilaf, and turkey sandwiches. Or maybe baked beans, alfredo noodles, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Regardless, it's fun to stretch your grocery money an extra week and start seeing some empty shelves in your pantry/fridge/freezer. Plus you find the things that it's time to throw away or maybe donate to a local food pantry. If you're not willing to eat it during "purge the kitchen week", you're probably never gonna eat it.
Tonight was nearing the end of said week at the Long house, and there was hardly a side to be found to go with our leftover bbq sandwiches. I'm proud to say that my dear family didn't voice one complaint at the white rice that I served alongside it. And then we had a bowl of muscadines for dessert. I was just determined to get another meal or two out of what we have. It may have something to do with my aversion to grocery shopping on beautiful days like we've been having. But whatever the reason, our bellies are full and my cupboards are quite bare. And I love seeing empty spaces in my house. There's just something relieving to me about it:)
Monday, September 6, 2010
Meals on Wheels
Today's project that I would like to pass on to my dear daughters is...take a meal to someone. A sweet couple that we are friends with have a 1 month old baby girl and the daddy had to have surgery this weekend, so we delivered a meal to them and got to check up on them, talk a little, and of course hold that precious baby. I know from being on the receiving end of many good meal deliveries that having such a basic need met during seasons of transition and/or recovery is priceless. And it's one of the few forms of help that people are more apt to be willing to receive these days. For instance, I begged that new mommy to call me one night when she realllly needs some sleep and let me get up with the baby and handle feedings and just hold her. But I doubt she'll take me up on that. I probably wouldn't. You just feel like, "I can't ask someone to do THAT much for me.". But if you call someone up who has had a baby or surgery or just got home from adopting or even just for no good reason other than spreading some love and say, "Hey. I wanna bring you and your fam some dinner tomorrow night. Is that ok?", you're much more likely to get a green light. And if you aren't of the culinary type, there's always Pizza Hut and KFC and even grocery store delis. No one really cares if it's homemade. It's showing you care and relieving someone of cooking duty for a night.
A lot of people in the church world are quite familiar with the idea of delivering meals to fellow members, but I say let's bust it out of the church. What about feeding the fam of someone you work with or a stressed out mom you know from your kids' gymnastic class or maybe one of your kids teachers or someone at your gym whose husband left them. It doesn't have to be ran through some church calendar meal ministry. There's something even more sweet and charming about it if someone knows that you just came up with it on your own instead of "signing up for it". Then again, I got a lot of "signed up for" meal deliveries after having each of my babies and they were appreciated as much as any spontaneous act of love, soooo...
Anyway, there's your challenge. Break out your best recipes, buy some disposable bowls and pans (it's always better when they don't have to worry about returning dishes to you), and be someone's dinner fairy. You'll be hard pressed to find someone who will turn you down.
A lot of people in the church world are quite familiar with the idea of delivering meals to fellow members, but I say let's bust it out of the church. What about feeding the fam of someone you work with or a stressed out mom you know from your kids' gymnastic class or maybe one of your kids teachers or someone at your gym whose husband left them. It doesn't have to be ran through some church calendar meal ministry. There's something even more sweet and charming about it if someone knows that you just came up with it on your own instead of "signing up for it". Then again, I got a lot of "signed up for" meal deliveries after having each of my babies and they were appreciated as much as any spontaneous act of love, soooo...
Anyway, there's your challenge. Break out your best recipes, buy some disposable bowls and pans (it's always better when they don't have to worry about returning dishes to you), and be someone's dinner fairy. You'll be hard pressed to find someone who will turn you down.
Sunday, September 5, 2010
The Lost Art of Potluck
There's just something about a bunch of people-some you know and some you don't know-getting together and each bringing some food to share. Hanging out, catching up with friends, getting to know someone new, all the kids off playing together...it's one thing that can make it feel less like the "modern age" with all the cell phones and technology and busyness, and more like a hundred years ago. A friend of mine had the genius idea to start a new tradition where she's inviting anyone at all to come over to her house for a yummy lunch the first Sunday of every month, and the first one was today. It was so much fun.
You can really break down a potluck dinner and find many amazing aspects:
1)They're cost efficient. In exchange for a homemade mac-n-cheese casserole and a chocolate peanut butter cake (which didn't really turn out that well), we fed our family of 5 an extreme amount of food.
2)There's something about eating with each other that just levels the playing field. In any other context someone's better and smarter and more experienced, but we all gotta eat and we're all pretty darn good at it. A conversation that I may be too intimidated to have in a meeting or over the phone seems to flow just fine over a big, ol' plate of fried chicken.
3)It can totally improve your mood. Now, this wasn't the case today, but there have been times when I was grumpy and had enough of the kiddos and mad at Jono and then went to eat with a big group of people. I start off faking my happiness and loving kindness towards my family and by the time we leave, that fake attitude has rubbed off and I'm really feeling quite pleasant towards them. Go figure.
4)It's free entertainment for the kids. Children who otherwise would be complaining about being bored at Six Flags are running around having the time of their lives with a stick and empty solo cups. When it's time to leave, they'll be begging you to stay a little longer.
I think that everyone should be a part of a consistent potluck dinner schedule. And not ones with ulterior motives, although those are fine. But to experience this phenomenon in its fullest glory, there can't be a meeting snuck in there. It's gotta be just food and whatever sweet convos happen to happen. So never turn down an invite to one. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that you should cancel anything that would prevent you from going to one and choose the potluck. And if you don't have a genius friend in your life who has instigated it, be brave and organize one yourself. It will be totally worth it. I've heard so many people go on and on about what a great time they had today. It was really wonderful. And there was no music or skits or clowns or magicians or tv or even games. Just- try hard to imagine- people talking and eating. That's all. It's surprising how simple we really are.
You can really break down a potluck dinner and find many amazing aspects:
1)They're cost efficient. In exchange for a homemade mac-n-cheese casserole and a chocolate peanut butter cake (which didn't really turn out that well), we fed our family of 5 an extreme amount of food.
2)There's something about eating with each other that just levels the playing field. In any other context someone's better and smarter and more experienced, but we all gotta eat and we're all pretty darn good at it. A conversation that I may be too intimidated to have in a meeting or over the phone seems to flow just fine over a big, ol' plate of fried chicken.
3)It can totally improve your mood. Now, this wasn't the case today, but there have been times when I was grumpy and had enough of the kiddos and mad at Jono and then went to eat with a big group of people. I start off faking my happiness and loving kindness towards my family and by the time we leave, that fake attitude has rubbed off and I'm really feeling quite pleasant towards them. Go figure.
4)It's free entertainment for the kids. Children who otherwise would be complaining about being bored at Six Flags are running around having the time of their lives with a stick and empty solo cups. When it's time to leave, they'll be begging you to stay a little longer.
I think that everyone should be a part of a consistent potluck dinner schedule. And not ones with ulterior motives, although those are fine. But to experience this phenomenon in its fullest glory, there can't be a meeting snuck in there. It's gotta be just food and whatever sweet convos happen to happen. So never turn down an invite to one. In fact, I'd go so far as to say that you should cancel anything that would prevent you from going to one and choose the potluck. And if you don't have a genius friend in your life who has instigated it, be brave and organize one yourself. It will be totally worth it. I've heard so many people go on and on about what a great time they had today. It was really wonderful. And there was no music or skits or clowns or magicians or tv or even games. Just- try hard to imagine- people talking and eating. That's all. It's surprising how simple we really are.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
Make do with whatcha got...
...or at least try to. If you're anything like me, the time will come when you're tired of all of your furniture and ready for some brand spankin' new stuff. That time has officially arrived for me. I'm 7 years in and ready for a change. But all new furniture is expensive and I have 3 little ones out to destroy all things new (not to mention a little one on the way from the Democratic Republic of the Congo). I did consider saving up for new stuff, which is usually my method, but that just seems unattainable. It would take forever for me to stash enough moolah with all of the other things that we are saving for right now (adoption, Long Outreach Ideas, etc.). So today I decided to take what I have and do my best to make it look like what I want. We had day 2 of our yard sale today (which ended fabulously...$500!!), so since I was stuck out on the driveway anyways, I decided to do a little makeover. I have this side table in my living room that was this cheapo looking blonde wood finish that I've been hating for quite a while now and have often tried to sneak into yard sales only to hear Jono say, "If we get rid of that what are we gonna use?". Uh, exactly! Then we would be forced to purchase the awesome white one I want from Target! Anyway, so I had my dear hubby haul it out to the garage, I Googled some tutorials about painting furniture, then I started my project. An electric sander, some primer, a few coats of white paint, and some polyurethane later, I have a pretty amazing looking side table! To use some "interior design lingo", it really did have some great, clean lines. It was just that yucky wood color that had me grumbling. But no longer. Jono and I both love it and it only cost me the $17 can of Minwax that I sent him to the store to buy. I already had everything else. It looks so good that there were a few yard sale customers trying to talk me out of it, but I told them that unless they were willing to pay me the same amount as the new one that I would have to purchase, no deal.
I'm so glad I did it this way instead of springing for something new. 1) It is totally wipeable and waterproof so no need to stress about kids spilling or forgetting coasters. 2) When the kids ding it from throwing random toys while dancing, I won't be freaking out saying "Do you know how much that cost?!". 3) I am super duper proud of it and will probably blurt out to everyone who enters my living room, "I painted that!".
So if you ever find yourself grumbling about how much your blue sofas disgust you -Yep. They're blue...but only underneath the nice khaki slipcovers I got from Target. $100 in slipcovers is waaaaay better than a couple thou in new seats- take a deep breath, refrain from nagging your poor hubby, and think, "How can I take what God has already given me, be thankful for it, and reinvent it to make it last a little longer?". There is seriously very little that a can of paint can't do.
And it's almost as good as a visit to the spa when you get to say, "Hey, babe, keep an eye on the kids. I gotta go out to the garage alone with my Pandora radio playing and apply another coat to the table that I'm painting to save us from having to spend your hard earned money on a brand new one. Ok?" Ahh. Pure bliss.
I'm so glad I did it this way instead of springing for something new. 1) It is totally wipeable and waterproof so no need to stress about kids spilling or forgetting coasters. 2) When the kids ding it from throwing random toys while dancing, I won't be freaking out saying "Do you know how much that cost?!". 3) I am super duper proud of it and will probably blurt out to everyone who enters my living room, "I painted that!".
So if you ever find yourself grumbling about how much your blue sofas disgust you -Yep. They're blue...but only underneath the nice khaki slipcovers I got from Target. $100 in slipcovers is waaaaay better than a couple thou in new seats- take a deep breath, refrain from nagging your poor hubby, and think, "How can I take what God has already given me, be thankful for it, and reinvent it to make it last a little longer?". There is seriously very little that a can of paint can't do.
And it's almost as good as a visit to the spa when you get to say, "Hey, babe, keep an eye on the kids. I gotta go out to the garage alone with my Pandora radio playing and apply another coat to the table that I'm painting to save us from having to spend your hard earned money on a brand new one. Ok?" Ahh. Pure bliss.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Shed the Stuff
Never underestimate the therapeutic qualities of a good, old-fashioned yard sale. We had one today and I absolutely LOVE the feeling of bringing armful after armful of junk out of my house knowing that it will never again enter it. I literally spent the whole day going through every closet and drawer and nook and cranny in my entire abode and lugging it out onto the driveway where quite a crowd of people were digging through it and, get this, GIVING ME MONEY FOR IT!!! It was amazing!! Especially since every penny earned is going towards the adoption we are currently in the middle of. I found myself saying, "I truly am a minimalist at heart." And then I thought, "Actually, I guess we are all really minimalists at heart...wired that way by our Creator." You know? I really think that "stuff" is toxic in a way, and every now and then we need to strip our household down to the bare necessities. Kinda like how people fast to get the toxins out of their bodies (I'm referring to the diet, "health nut" fast...not the spiritual kind). And you would be surprised at how you just feel less stress when it's all said and done. It's like a diet for your house. And if money is not an issue for you (or you just hate the idea of spending a weekend bartering with complete strangers), pare down your belongings anyway and haul them off to a charity or thrift shop. It's never really about the money. In fact I always go into a yard sale reminding myself of this. It's about decluttering that special place you call home and knowing that everything that's left are really things that you love, use, or need. I mean, why does someone who doesn't drink wine need 18 wine glasses? And how did my extreme cheapness in the area of gift bags culminate in a HUGE bin of them for every occasion taking up at least 10 square feet of space? There are literally families in Brazil whose entire living quarters equal my ex-gift bag storage!! Absurd!
So go through your junk and quit holding on to those shorts you may wear next year or that microwave casserole bowl that some recipe may call for using one day. Even the little things that grandma gave you or are from high school...if it's not special enough to put in a prominent place, let it go. I make this promise to my kids: I will never come to your yard sale and have hurt feelings about things you're getting rid of that I gave you. In fact, I'll high five you and be proud of your ability to keep material things in their rightful place...they serve you, not the other way around. When they cease to serve you because they're crammed in the back of the junk drawer, send 'em packin'.
And let all that work be a reminder to try your hardest to accumulate less from now on. ("Hmmm, I just sold 3 tons of flip flops that I have never worn so maybe I won't go crazy this time when Old Navy has their $1 sale.")
So go through your junk and quit holding on to those shorts you may wear next year or that microwave casserole bowl that some recipe may call for using one day. Even the little things that grandma gave you or are from high school...if it's not special enough to put in a prominent place, let it go. I make this promise to my kids: I will never come to your yard sale and have hurt feelings about things you're getting rid of that I gave you. In fact, I'll high five you and be proud of your ability to keep material things in their rightful place...they serve you, not the other way around. When they cease to serve you because they're crammed in the back of the junk drawer, send 'em packin'.
And let all that work be a reminder to try your hardest to accumulate less from now on. ("Hmmm, I just sold 3 tons of flip flops that I have never worn so maybe I won't go crazy this time when Old Navy has their $1 sale.")
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Blog Revamp
So, if you haven't noticed, I'm lacking a little in the motivation department of blogging. Pretty much, I only blog when Jono guilts me into doing it. I am very thankful for my 8 sweet followers (including my mother, husband, friend that I begged to follow me, and sister that I happened to be on her computer and made follow me), but that's just not enough to get me typing regularly. And, the thing is, I really enjoy writing. I mean, not enough to stay up late at night writing a memoir or anything, but a paragraph or two a day sounds good. So I decided that I need to have a specific goal in mind to make me do the deed. I had the idea of posting every day about redoing my house little by little, but realized that there would be MANY days that there would be nothing to talk about due to time and money limitations. I also considered doing it "journal-esque", but, no offense, I really don't want my every thought and feeling floating around on the world wide web. So I finally decided that I will write a post a day about things that I would want my girls to read when they are in the season of life that I am now. My goal is to post about something that I learned, thought of, or did THAT DAY in order to motivate me to accomplish some projects as well. For instance, if I want to post about the importance of keeping your kitchen cabinets organized, I'll have to actually bust out the pots and pans that day. No vague posting about what could be. This way, I won't be able to talk myself out of blogging because, "What's the point? No one reads it." The main recipients are my precious daughters, and if anyone else happens to benefit from it (or get a laugh, or feel better about themselves), that's just icing on the cake.
I am actually extremely embarrassed and ashamed about what I would like to share tonight. But there's nothing like good ol' transparency. Do not give in to the temptation to get acrylic nails (or gel, or whatever new-fangled type fake nails they'll have 23 years from now)! I know that it is hard...especially when you see others with those perfectly manicured, shiny talons. And the way you love your cheapo press on nails now, I see it coming. I have given in to the temptation numerous times since my senior year (1999), and then swore them off...only to give in again. But as of today, I have a NAIL FUNGUS from those disgusting things. Stick a fork in me, I am done. Now, I know that you may think "That hardly ever happens", but there are a few other reasons that I would encourage you to stay away from those nail falsies.
First of all, short, clean, well-filed natural nails truly are the nicest, most sophisticated look. Time may change things, but never do you see a classic beauty sporting acrylics. Fergie, maybe, but not the Jackie O's of the world.
Secondly, what a waste of money they are!! You're talking $20-$35 dollars every 3 weeks (or 5 weeks if you try to stretch them like me)!! That's an expensive habit. And all for vanity. Do some research and you'll find that there are people in the world living off of about 30 cents a day. How dare I blow more than that on such a trivial part of my beauty regimen?! Really, how often do you hear, "Her best feature is her awesome, long, thick nails."?
So I hope that you will do what I am going to do. Every time I'm tempted (though, after having a stinkin' fungus I don't see that happening ever again!), I will figure out how I can give the amount I would be wasting away.
Let me pray about it: "Dear God, thanks for this $30 You gave me. Would you rather me give it to someone in need and show Your love to them or use it to bling out my nails?"
See. That makes it a little easier, right? :)
P.s. For all non-daughters reading this, I do not pass judgment on anyone who chooses the fake nail route. This is just a decision I've made and the advise that I would give to my babies.
I am actually extremely embarrassed and ashamed about what I would like to share tonight. But there's nothing like good ol' transparency. Do not give in to the temptation to get acrylic nails (or gel, or whatever new-fangled type fake nails they'll have 23 years from now)! I know that it is hard...especially when you see others with those perfectly manicured, shiny talons. And the way you love your cheapo press on nails now, I see it coming. I have given in to the temptation numerous times since my senior year (1999), and then swore them off...only to give in again. But as of today, I have a NAIL FUNGUS from those disgusting things. Stick a fork in me, I am done. Now, I know that you may think "That hardly ever happens", but there are a few other reasons that I would encourage you to stay away from those nail falsies.
First of all, short, clean, well-filed natural nails truly are the nicest, most sophisticated look. Time may change things, but never do you see a classic beauty sporting acrylics. Fergie, maybe, but not the Jackie O's of the world.
Secondly, what a waste of money they are!! You're talking $20-$35 dollars every 3 weeks (or 5 weeks if you try to stretch them like me)!! That's an expensive habit. And all for vanity. Do some research and you'll find that there are people in the world living off of about 30 cents a day. How dare I blow more than that on such a trivial part of my beauty regimen?! Really, how often do you hear, "Her best feature is her awesome, long, thick nails."?
So I hope that you will do what I am going to do. Every time I'm tempted (though, after having a stinkin' fungus I don't see that happening ever again!), I will figure out how I can give the amount I would be wasting away.
Let me pray about it: "Dear God, thanks for this $30 You gave me. Would you rather me give it to someone in need and show Your love to them or use it to bling out my nails?"
See. That makes it a little easier, right? :)
P.s. For all non-daughters reading this, I do not pass judgment on anyone who chooses the fake nail route. This is just a decision I've made and the advise that I would give to my babies.
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Smooth Sailing...kinda
Well, we have begun the home study/adoption process yet again. Everything was on hold for a few months as we have sought every viable possibility of us being able to adopt Oksana and Vitya. The lady doing our home study didn’t want to continue (I’m pretty sure she thinks that we’re crazy for being so psycho about these two kids) so we made calls, sent emails, and looked for any “connections” that could help us get those sweeties. Neither Jono nor I had felt a peace about their situation. Actually, I’ll be straight with you and admit that we still really don’t…but we want to. And that’s a step. There was a time when I was dead-set against feeling a peace about anyone being their mommy and daddy but us. But now I’m begging God to give it to me. He has taught me so much over the last few months about His holiness and sovereignty, and I can now fully apply that knowledge to this situation and trust Him to just do His thing. As I said, the peace isn’t there yet, but the trust is.
One of my Sunday School teachers when I was younger once told me that you just can’t wait until you know exactly what God wants you to do before you start moving. He said that it’s kinda like a boat…you can’t turn a boat that’s standing still. There has to be some forward momentum before the steering can begin (I am nautically ignorant, so I hope this analogy holds up.) And so sometimes you gotta just start moving on what you even kinda think God’s asking of you and then He has something to direct and guide. God reminded me of this lesson and was like, “Heather, quit trying to figure out all these details. Just start moving in general again.” Because, quite frankly, I was frozen. It felt like I was betraying O and V by moving on. And yet , doors were slamming in our faces left and right. So as we made the decision to get started again, Jono and I vowed that if EVER the time came when somehow we can get Oksana and/or Vitya, we will.
During all of this, Jono took some high school students on a mission trip to Curitiba, Brazil and met two little girls who melted his heart at an orphanage they visited. So as soon as he got home we started making calls to find out if their parents’ rights had been severed yet. It took a few months (Which is weird to me in the age of email and skype. I mean, we’re not sending telegrams here.), but we eventually found out that neither one was adoptable. Which put us in a very strange place. We had grown accustomed to pursuing children with whom we had a connection, and now we were out of connections. We didn’t know how to pick a country. Do you just look online and find where the cutest kids are? Or where it’s the cheapest or fastest to adopt from? Yeah, that all sounds pretty self-serving and disgusting, right?
Before we had found out that the little Brazilian girls were out of the question, we had discovered an adoption agency called One World Adoptions. After a few phone calls and emails, we fell in love with this agency and decided to get started on a home study. So when we were in that icky place of picking a program, a plan came to us. These people deal with a bunch of countries and orphanages, and they even go on mission trips to the various orphanages. So we decided that we would ask Susan, the director of OWA, where the worst conditions are and where the greatest need is. We felt like that left it open more to God’s preferences than to ours. Well, her answer was immediate and no questions about it…the Democratic Republic of the Congo. This is a fairly new program because there has been a 5 year civil war in this country, and about 15 years of craziness. There are so many children who are “true orphans” where both parents are deceased due to war or disease (mainly HIV). There are a lot of prenatal and childbirth issues that lead to mommies dying and leaving newborns. Many are also considered “social orphans” and their parents have abandoned them because they are unable to care for them. There is an estimated 4.2 million orphans in DRC.
So we have buckled down and got to work on getting our baby that God has for us home. After we told One World that if the Congo is where the need is, then the Congo is where we would go, they informed us that the timeline is like 6 MONTHS! That’s super crazy after having followed several of our friends adoptions from the Ukraine, Russia, and Brazil that took over a year. That’s not even the length of a pregnancy! But it’s all cool with me because I get antsy when things are drawn out and long anyway. Those who know me know that I work best under pressure and time crunches.
Our home study is almost finished, which we have decided that everyone should experience every now and then whether you’re adopting or not. My sister is actually doing all of the requirements that we do just to get caught up on little things like getting the septic tank pumped. Did you know you should do that every 5 years? And, apparently, a family of 5 like ours should do it every 3 years. We have new batteries in our smoke detectors, our weapons cache is safely stored away from the ammunition that would make it useful in the event of a break in, our dog is now guarded against rabies, and in 2 days all my babies will be vaccinated, inspected, and cleared to be brother and sisters to their new sibling. Next up, dossier.
One thing that everyone asks and you may be wondering is, “How old of a child are you gonna get and do you want a boy or a girl?” Well, because of the tremendous amount of orphans there and this being a fairly new program, there are infants up to teenagers available…as opposed to some programs where it’s harder to get younger children because that’s what everyone wants. So right now we are looking at a girl under 4. We will actually probably pursue two children. Sibling groups are rare in this country because they are abandoned one at a time and there is not quite the system of keeping track of relatives there that other countries have. But you can still adopt 2 unrelated children.
I realize that this post is getting excruciatingly long, so I will save issues like “How we’re raising money” and “Promise 686 Rocks” and “The Long’s Summer Project of studying up on the Congo” for future posts. But I will ask that you talk to God on our behalf and our Congolese child’s behalf. The boat is moving and God has guided us in a direction that we never saw coming.!!
One of my Sunday School teachers when I was younger once told me that you just can’t wait until you know exactly what God wants you to do before you start moving. He said that it’s kinda like a boat…you can’t turn a boat that’s standing still. There has to be some forward momentum before the steering can begin (I am nautically ignorant, so I hope this analogy holds up.) And so sometimes you gotta just start moving on what you even kinda think God’s asking of you and then He has something to direct and guide. God reminded me of this lesson and was like, “Heather, quit trying to figure out all these details. Just start moving in general again.” Because, quite frankly, I was frozen. It felt like I was betraying O and V by moving on. And yet , doors were slamming in our faces left and right. So as we made the decision to get started again, Jono and I vowed that if EVER the time came when somehow we can get Oksana and/or Vitya, we will.
During all of this, Jono took some high school students on a mission trip to Curitiba, Brazil and met two little girls who melted his heart at an orphanage they visited. So as soon as he got home we started making calls to find out if their parents’ rights had been severed yet. It took a few months (Which is weird to me in the age of email and skype. I mean, we’re not sending telegrams here.), but we eventually found out that neither one was adoptable. Which put us in a very strange place. We had grown accustomed to pursuing children with whom we had a connection, and now we were out of connections. We didn’t know how to pick a country. Do you just look online and find where the cutest kids are? Or where it’s the cheapest or fastest to adopt from? Yeah, that all sounds pretty self-serving and disgusting, right?
Before we had found out that the little Brazilian girls were out of the question, we had discovered an adoption agency called One World Adoptions. After a few phone calls and emails, we fell in love with this agency and decided to get started on a home study. So when we were in that icky place of picking a program, a plan came to us. These people deal with a bunch of countries and orphanages, and they even go on mission trips to the various orphanages. So we decided that we would ask Susan, the director of OWA, where the worst conditions are and where the greatest need is. We felt like that left it open more to God’s preferences than to ours. Well, her answer was immediate and no questions about it…the Democratic Republic of the Congo. This is a fairly new program because there has been a 5 year civil war in this country, and about 15 years of craziness. There are so many children who are “true orphans” where both parents are deceased due to war or disease (mainly HIV). There are a lot of prenatal and childbirth issues that lead to mommies dying and leaving newborns. Many are also considered “social orphans” and their parents have abandoned them because they are unable to care for them. There is an estimated 4.2 million orphans in DRC.
So we have buckled down and got to work on getting our baby that God has for us home. After we told One World that if the Congo is where the need is, then the Congo is where we would go, they informed us that the timeline is like 6 MONTHS! That’s super crazy after having followed several of our friends adoptions from the Ukraine, Russia, and Brazil that took over a year. That’s not even the length of a pregnancy! But it’s all cool with me because I get antsy when things are drawn out and long anyway. Those who know me know that I work best under pressure and time crunches.
Our home study is almost finished, which we have decided that everyone should experience every now and then whether you’re adopting or not. My sister is actually doing all of the requirements that we do just to get caught up on little things like getting the septic tank pumped. Did you know you should do that every 5 years? And, apparently, a family of 5 like ours should do it every 3 years. We have new batteries in our smoke detectors, our weapons cache is safely stored away from the ammunition that would make it useful in the event of a break in, our dog is now guarded against rabies, and in 2 days all my babies will be vaccinated, inspected, and cleared to be brother and sisters to their new sibling. Next up, dossier.
One thing that everyone asks and you may be wondering is, “How old of a child are you gonna get and do you want a boy or a girl?” Well, because of the tremendous amount of orphans there and this being a fairly new program, there are infants up to teenagers available…as opposed to some programs where it’s harder to get younger children because that’s what everyone wants. So right now we are looking at a girl under 4. We will actually probably pursue two children. Sibling groups are rare in this country because they are abandoned one at a time and there is not quite the system of keeping track of relatives there that other countries have. But you can still adopt 2 unrelated children.
I realize that this post is getting excruciatingly long, so I will save issues like “How we’re raising money” and “Promise 686 Rocks” and “The Long’s Summer Project of studying up on the Congo” for future posts. But I will ask that you talk to God on our behalf and our Congolese child’s behalf. The boat is moving and God has guided us in a direction that we never saw coming.!!
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Day O' Moms!!
It's Mother's Day and I have just a few things to say...
1. I love my mom! She'll do just about anything for one of her kids or grandkids and I've relied on her many a time to run an errand, babysit, or return something to a store that I'm too scared to deal with (she may be known as "The Bulldog" at our local Kohl's, Walmart, Target, etc.)
2. I love my kids! I honestly have the best bunch! They're sweet and affectionate, super tender-hearted, spunky enough to keep life interesting, complicated enough to teach their momma something everyday, and they love learning about God and cuddling with their Mommy!! I'll be straight up with you and tell you that I never wanna stop having them. No worries...we have no plans to become the next Dugger family, but I just love every stage of their little lives and I know that I'll be so sad when it stops.
3. If you're a Mommy and are looking for any and every resource to make you a better Mommy, here's a few I've found...
And I also LOVE listening to "Focus on the Family" broadcasts on my iPhone. I have no idea how to get to them without that miracle device, but I'm sure you can figure it out! There's always tons of broadcasts on parenting topics to choose from! I have vowed to make better use of my time by learning while I do other things so I never drive, get ready, or feed Pax without listening to a good parenting or marriage podcast from FOTF or a sermon by the uh-mazing Craig Groeschel.
The last awesome resource is.......drum roll please........ YOUR LOCAL CHURCH!!! Autumn, our children's minister at Crossroads Church of Walton County, provides a blog for all parents where we can print out Godtime Cards and lots of other resources to help us disciple our kids. I'll take all the help that I can get, and I bet most of you mom's feel the same way. But I think this is an under-utilized resource. Hey, it's free!! Use it!
4. Our fam had an AWESOME time at Disney World! That will get a longer post when I am less tired!
5. I own a swagger wagon...do you?
1. I love my mom! She'll do just about anything for one of her kids or grandkids and I've relied on her many a time to run an errand, babysit, or return something to a store that I'm too scared to deal with (she may be known as "The Bulldog" at our local Kohl's, Walmart, Target, etc.)
2. I love my kids! I honestly have the best bunch! They're sweet and affectionate, super tender-hearted, spunky enough to keep life interesting, complicated enough to teach their momma something everyday, and they love learning about God and cuddling with their Mommy!! I'll be straight up with you and tell you that I never wanna stop having them. No worries...we have no plans to become the next Dugger family, but I just love every stage of their little lives and I know that I'll be so sad when it stops.
3. If you're a Mommy and are looking for any and every resource to make you a better Mommy, here's a few I've found...
And I also LOVE listening to "Focus on the Family" broadcasts on my iPhone. I have no idea how to get to them without that miracle device, but I'm sure you can figure it out! There's always tons of broadcasts on parenting topics to choose from! I have vowed to make better use of my time by learning while I do other things so I never drive, get ready, or feed Pax without listening to a good parenting or marriage podcast from FOTF or a sermon by the uh-mazing Craig Groeschel.
The last awesome resource is.......drum roll please........ YOUR LOCAL CHURCH!!! Autumn, our children's minister at Crossroads Church of Walton County, provides a blog for all parents where we can print out Godtime Cards and lots of other resources to help us disciple our kids. I'll take all the help that I can get, and I bet most of you mom's feel the same way. But I think this is an under-utilized resource. Hey, it's free!! Use it!
4. Our fam had an AWESOME time at Disney World! That will get a longer post when I am less tired!
5. I own a swagger wagon...do you?
Monday, April 26, 2010
A Call to Die
Today is just a quick book suggestion. I'm going to try and mention good books a lot as I come across them because I think they make good mentors. When I have times in my life when there's not someone there pouring into me and discipling me personally, I always turn to books. I love all kinds of genres, but I've had to pretty much nix all fiction books at this stage of my life because I have so little time to read I figure that I better make it something extremely useful. So fiction is reserved for laying on the beach, otherwise it's good books that teach me and grow me spiritually.
The book for today is actually a devotional created for students, but I recommend it for adults as well. It's called "A Call to Die" by David Nasser. I am currently going through it with my small group of 10th and 11th grade girls. It's my 3rd time through it and it's still wearing me out. It really is an awesome tool to step up your quiet times. It suggests carving out an hour a day for it, but if that sounds overwhelming you could cut out some of the journaling. I totally recommend actually doing all of the journaling because it really helps you focus on what God is specifically telling you, but I think the book is so good that I'd rather you skip the writing than not read it at all. Some of the applications are more student-focused, but overall it is really for anyone. If you have a teenager in your life (son or daughter, niece/nephew, a kid from church, neighbor), kill two birds with one stone and go through it together...you grow and they get discipled.
It's a 40 day journey of fasting from the world and feasting on God. I've haven't heard of anyone who's gone through it that didn't LOVE it. Click on the pic below to buy it!!!
The book for today is actually a devotional created for students, but I recommend it for adults as well. It's called "A Call to Die" by David Nasser. I am currently going through it with my small group of 10th and 11th grade girls. It's my 3rd time through it and it's still wearing me out. It really is an awesome tool to step up your quiet times. It suggests carving out an hour a day for it, but if that sounds overwhelming you could cut out some of the journaling. I totally recommend actually doing all of the journaling because it really helps you focus on what God is specifically telling you, but I think the book is so good that I'd rather you skip the writing than not read it at all. Some of the applications are more student-focused, but overall it is really for anyone. If you have a teenager in your life (son or daughter, niece/nephew, a kid from church, neighbor), kill two birds with one stone and go through it together...you grow and they get discipled.
It's a 40 day journey of fasting from the world and feasting on God. I've haven't heard of anyone who's gone through it that didn't LOVE it. Click on the pic below to buy it!!!
Thursday, April 22, 2010
What Do You Feel Called To Do?
Oh my. I confess right here and now that I am a terrible blogger. If I get really busy or in a funk, this blog is the first thing to drop out of my schedule. Hence the lead in from my last post promising more on a topic "tomorrow"...it's only been 4 weeks. But I'm still as fired up about the issue as I was then (and probably always will be), so here we go.
Here's what gets me. So, there's a need in the church. This body of believers that Jesus Himself is the head of has some holes that need to be filled. Maybe there's no one to invest into the lives of kindergartners or maybe 1 man is trying to disciple a group of 15 6th grade boys and REALLY needs to share the burden. Maybe the children's minister hasn't been in "big church" in 9 months or maybe a community group/sunday school class/ bible study is having trouble being effective because there's no one to keep the kiddos. There are a lot of "holes" that pop up in ministry all the time. But there's also a lot of people in our churches claiming to be Christ-followers. So, you'd think "Lots of Christ-followers. Lots of needs in Christ's body. Problem solved." But this is most definitely not the case, thanks to the wonderful and spiritual phrase, "I just don't feel like that's where I'm called to serve." You gotta admit that's pretty good. I mean, whose gonna argue with that? (Other than me, that is:)) If you're not feeling "called" to do it, who am I to beg and plead with you?
I, however, would like someone to show me in the Bible where that is a legit excuse. I'm pretty sure that by saying they don't "feel called" to it really means that it's not something that gives them the warm fuzzies. It's not glamorous. They pretty much just don't feel like doing it. But what I find in the Bible are lots of people doing things that they don't feel like doing. Jonah didn't "feel like" preaching to the people in Ninevah. I'm sure John the Baptist didn't get all giddy about the idea of confronting Herod knowing it could cost him his life (and did, in fact). And probably the best example is Jesus. He wasn't excited about dying on a cross. He even asked for a way out. But, ultimately, He did what He knew had to be done. So, bottom line, you can't assume that God is only going to lead you to do things that are fun or exciting or right up your alley. There is no promise in the Bible that says that you will hear a choir of angels and get an adrenaline rush when just the right opportunity arises and then you'll know that that is what you're "called" to do. Nope. You may hate the idea. You may sweat blood like Jesus (especially if it's the 6th grade boys' group). Maybe you'll even beg God to "take this cup from you". And that's fine. As long as, in the end, you suck it up and just do what needs to be done.
I do think that sometimes there is a second reason for using the "don't feel called" excuse. For instance, take the aforementioned middle school boys' group scenario. Or maybe leading a bible study. Or discipling a younger man or woman. A lot of times it's not just that it doesn't sound fun and perfect, but also that we don't feel the least bit qualified. We freak out and back out because we know that we will stink at it. And that just may be true. But I've found that that's usually God's point.
"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise."
-1 Cor. 1:27
Maybe you think, "I'm too foolish to lead that small group". Ummm...maybe that's a sign that God's choosing you to lead that small group.
Here's what gets me. So, there's a need in the church. This body of believers that Jesus Himself is the head of has some holes that need to be filled. Maybe there's no one to invest into the lives of kindergartners or maybe 1 man is trying to disciple a group of 15 6th grade boys and REALLY needs to share the burden. Maybe the children's minister hasn't been in "big church" in 9 months or maybe a community group/sunday school class/ bible study is having trouble being effective because there's no one to keep the kiddos. There are a lot of "holes" that pop up in ministry all the time. But there's also a lot of people in our churches claiming to be Christ-followers. So, you'd think "Lots of Christ-followers. Lots of needs in Christ's body. Problem solved." But this is most definitely not the case, thanks to the wonderful and spiritual phrase, "I just don't feel like that's where I'm called to serve." You gotta admit that's pretty good. I mean, whose gonna argue with that? (Other than me, that is:)) If you're not feeling "called" to do it, who am I to beg and plead with you?
I, however, would like someone to show me in the Bible where that is a legit excuse. I'm pretty sure that by saying they don't "feel called" to it really means that it's not something that gives them the warm fuzzies. It's not glamorous. They pretty much just don't feel like doing it. But what I find in the Bible are lots of people doing things that they don't feel like doing. Jonah didn't "feel like" preaching to the people in Ninevah. I'm sure John the Baptist didn't get all giddy about the idea of confronting Herod knowing it could cost him his life (and did, in fact). And probably the best example is Jesus. He wasn't excited about dying on a cross. He even asked for a way out. But, ultimately, He did what He knew had to be done. So, bottom line, you can't assume that God is only going to lead you to do things that are fun or exciting or right up your alley. There is no promise in the Bible that says that you will hear a choir of angels and get an adrenaline rush when just the right opportunity arises and then you'll know that that is what you're "called" to do. Nope. You may hate the idea. You may sweat blood like Jesus (especially if it's the 6th grade boys' group). Maybe you'll even beg God to "take this cup from you". And that's fine. As long as, in the end, you suck it up and just do what needs to be done.
I do think that sometimes there is a second reason for using the "don't feel called" excuse. For instance, take the aforementioned middle school boys' group scenario. Or maybe leading a bible study. Or discipling a younger man or woman. A lot of times it's not just that it doesn't sound fun and perfect, but also that we don't feel the least bit qualified. We freak out and back out because we know that we will stink at it. And that just may be true. But I've found that that's usually God's point.
"But God chose the foolish things of the world to shame the wise."
-1 Cor. 1:27
"My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit's power." -1 Cor. 2:4
Maybe you think, "But I'm not wise and persuasive enough." Well, apparently if you were there would be no way for the Holy Spirit to demonstrate His power."But he said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me."
-2 Cor. 12:9
"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses..."
-2 Cor. 12:10
-2 Cor. 12:9
Maybe you use your weaknesses as an excuse to not do anything instead of boasting about them.
"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses..."
-2 Cor. 12:10
The problem is that lots of Christians, hugely including myself, have bought into the lie that their effectiveness depends on their ability (thank you to my dear hubby for giving me that quote last night at his AWESOME bible study). So when we hear that the kids' ministry or the student ministry or the adult ministry needs a new small group leader we immediately assess our abilities. If we don't feel like they measure up, then obviously we aren't "called" to do it. But God says, "Yeah, you don't measure up. In fact you never will. You will never be smart enough or cool enough or able enough to transform someone's life. So would you please just do something that you know you stink at and MAYBE My power will be enough to take up your slack?" It's one of the many paradoxes of the Christian faith...the weaker you are at it, the more of God's power gets revealed.
In summary, I would like to say that I do acknowledge that God does have different "callings" for different people. For instance, Jono and I know that we have been "called" to lifelong, full-time ministry. (Apparently I have an issue with the word "called" since I find myself putting quotations around it every time. It's just been abused.) So yes, I know that there are going to be specific things that God is going to want you to do with your life. But, in the words of my hubby again, "There are some things you just do because you're part of the family." I don't wait until I "feel" like doing the laundry because, I assure you, the day would never come. Jono doesn't wait until he "feels" like taking out the garbage. I don't let my kids just wait until they "feel" like cleaning their rooms.
If you're part of the family and something needs to be done, you do it.
And if you're still struggling with feelings of inadequacy read 1 & 2 Corinthians. Paul, who wrote most of the new testament and was like the ULTIMATE missionary goes on and on about how inadequate he was. You should also check out this book:
*I would like to point out that the examples given as areas of need in a church are just random scenarios that I pulled out of my head. None of them are necessarily needs within my AWESOME church, Crossroads. In fact, our 6th grade boys already have an AMAZING LEADER and they don't need to split. This post is not intended to guilt anyone and is not written as a public service announcement for Crossroads. It truly is something that God had to teach me through the many times I have tried to wiggle out of service because something didn't strike my fancy or I just plain out knew I couldn't pull it off. I apologize for any semblance of pointing my finger. Believe me, this has been and probably will be again a plank in my own eye. Just sharing something I've learned.
In summary, I would like to say that I do acknowledge that God does have different "callings" for different people. For instance, Jono and I know that we have been "called" to lifelong, full-time ministry. (Apparently I have an issue with the word "called" since I find myself putting quotations around it every time. It's just been abused.) So yes, I know that there are going to be specific things that God is going to want you to do with your life. But, in the words of my hubby again, "There are some things you just do because you're part of the family." I don't wait until I "feel" like doing the laundry because, I assure you, the day would never come. Jono doesn't wait until he "feels" like taking out the garbage. I don't let my kids just wait until they "feel" like cleaning their rooms.
If you're part of the family and something needs to be done, you do it.
And if you're still struggling with feelings of inadequacy read 1 & 2 Corinthians. Paul, who wrote most of the new testament and was like the ULTIMATE missionary goes on and on about how inadequate he was. You should also check out this book:
*I would like to point out that the examples given as areas of need in a church are just random scenarios that I pulled out of my head. None of them are necessarily needs within my AWESOME church, Crossroads. In fact, our 6th grade boys already have an AMAZING LEADER and they don't need to split. This post is not intended to guilt anyone and is not written as a public service announcement for Crossroads. It truly is something that God had to teach me through the many times I have tried to wiggle out of service because something didn't strike my fancy or I just plain out knew I couldn't pull it off. I apologize for any semblance of pointing my finger. Believe me, this has been and probably will be again a plank in my own eye. Just sharing something I've learned.
Saturday, March 27, 2010
Bologna Sandwiches
Last Friday night we took a group of students to The Garden. It is a homeless shelter in Smyrna that houses about 50 women and children. We went to throw a birthday party for all of the children there, which I thought sounded super exciting. Balloons, cupcakes, a pinata, and lots of games and singing with some kiddos. That's right up my alley. I love throwing birthday parties. But we started the evening off by making sack lunches for the ministry there to pass out to homeless people today. So I volunteered for bologna sandwich making. It was just 150 sandwiches and there was about 5 of us working on it, so it wasn't that bad. Then a lady came in and asked us sandwich makers if we could help out and make a "few more" sandwiches. She said around 250, but I swear we must have made a couple thousand mechanically separated meat sandwiches. I would spread a loaf of bread out over the counter. Kevin O. would apply mustard (then "mustard sauce" after we ran out of regular mustard...ugh). I would oh-so-carefully place the bologna on, then both of us would put them together and pass them down to the bagging team. I'm gonna be straight with you and say...it was terrible. I hate monotonous work. Doing the same thing over and over for 3 hours is torture for me. I hate it. And what's worse, I didn't realize I was missing the birthday party until Jono came in the kitchen and said, "Alright. The party's over. Ya'll ready to go?" I was super bummed. Everyone else had bonded with a kid and ministered to them and taken lots of pictures. I had made bologna sandwiches. It was not my idea of a glorious night of ministry. (I must say here that Kevin O'Shields seemed to quite enjoy himself being "mustard man" which I couldn't quite understand except that he attributed it to having a Type A personality.)
Anyway, I say all that to say that sometimes ministry stinks (quite literally when we're talking about bologna). And I don't mean "THE ministry", like being married to a pastor, although that's a completely different post. I mean serving. Doing things for God's kingdom that need to be done. It's not all rainbows and butterflies and coming home with lots of cute pictures of you with a bunch of homeless kids who fell in love with you. Someone's gotta make the bologna sandwiches in God's kingdom.
And, no, it's not a matter of feeling "called" to do it (which I will blog about further tomorrow). Believe me, there was no feeling of "this is what I was made for" last night.
It was not fun.
But Saturday, there were a lot of people living under bridges in Atlanta who got to eat a yummy sandwich for lunch, and that makes me grateful that God stuck me in that kitchen.
I wonder what kind of things God wants you to make happen but you're waiting on it to "feel" right?? More on that rant tomorrow!!
Anyway, I say all that to say that sometimes ministry stinks (quite literally when we're talking about bologna). And I don't mean "THE ministry", like being married to a pastor, although that's a completely different post. I mean serving. Doing things for God's kingdom that need to be done. It's not all rainbows and butterflies and coming home with lots of cute pictures of you with a bunch of homeless kids who fell in love with you. Someone's gotta make the bologna sandwiches in God's kingdom.
And, no, it's not a matter of feeling "called" to do it (which I will blog about further tomorrow). Believe me, there was no feeling of "this is what I was made for" last night.
It was not fun.
But Saturday, there were a lot of people living under bridges in Atlanta who got to eat a yummy sandwich for lunch, and that makes me grateful that God stuck me in that kitchen.
I wonder what kind of things God wants you to make happen but you're waiting on it to "feel" right?? More on that rant tomorrow!!
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Pass on the Blessing
Last night, a couple of hours after dinner, my family got the munchies. I intentionally do not keep many/any "munchies-satisfying-food" in the house. I always have the munchies so I would always be eating said food, nullifying all of my P90x-ing. So Jono began to scour the kitchen for something and finally decided to fix himself a peanut butter sandwich. Which only led to him having to fix 2 more peanut butter sandwiches for the bottomless pit girls. As he was finishing up Nevaeh's sandwich she requested that he cut the crust off. He then offered (possibly out of laziness) to cut the sandwich in half and then she could just "eat around the crust". No, Vaeh - shockingly - was not willing to compromise and started to beg/freak out. The whole time I was thinking "Really, Jono? You really think dealing with the tizzy that is about to ensue is going to take up less time and energy than CUTTING OFF THE CRUST?!" So, being the awesome wife that I am, I may have pointed out that he grew up with MEMAW and EVERY TIME she made him a sandwich she cut the crust off. How's that for forgetting to pass on the blessing? And Vaeh clearly got her dislike for crust from him soooo. I was just saying. Well, I guess he thought I had a point because, bless his heart, he served her a crustless sandwich.
Then as we plopped down to watch Criminal Minds, I had a thought/conviction. In the same way that I think it is ridiculous for a man who hates crust and has had it cut off his sandwich all his life to refuse the same service to his daughter, God finds it ridiculous when I --who have been forgiven of the unforgivable, loved when I was unlovable, and "beared with" (I think that would be correctly said "born with" but thought that sounded weird:)) when I was being unbearable by Him who has every right to hold all those things against me--refuse to "pass on the blessing" to others. I know you probably don't deal with that, but sometimes I find it hard to extend the very grace and forgiveness that I thank and praise God for giving to me.
Soo...even though I resisted the pb sandwich raid, I still got hit with a wave of guilt. Holy guilt, nonetheless. I leave you with an awesome quote that I stole from John Hall (The Mark Hall's father!):
"No one has ever done anything to me that's worse than what I have done to God."
and a verse:
"Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." -Col.3:13
and a subnote:
Jono is an awesome father and this post is in no way meant to sound nagging...I can't help it God saw a teachable moment that involved him:).
Then as we plopped down to watch Criminal Minds, I had a thought/conviction. In the same way that I think it is ridiculous for a man who hates crust and has had it cut off his sandwich all his life to refuse the same service to his daughter, God finds it ridiculous when I --who have been forgiven of the unforgivable, loved when I was unlovable, and "beared with" (I think that would be correctly said "born with" but thought that sounded weird:)) when I was being unbearable by Him who has every right to hold all those things against me--refuse to "pass on the blessing" to others. I know you probably don't deal with that, but sometimes I find it hard to extend the very grace and forgiveness that I thank and praise God for giving to me.
Soo...even though I resisted the pb sandwich raid, I still got hit with a wave of guilt. Holy guilt, nonetheless. I leave you with an awesome quote that I stole from John Hall (The Mark Hall's father!):
"No one has ever done anything to me that's worse than what I have done to God."
and a verse:
"Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you." -Col.3:13
and a subnote:
Jono is an awesome father and this post is in no way meant to sound nagging...I can't help it God saw a teachable moment that involved him:).
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